The Gambler | Page 6

make his appearance--generally an
Englishman, or an Asiatic, or a Turk--and (as had happened during the
summer of which I write) win or lose a great deal; but, as regards the
rest of the crowd, it plays only for petty gulden, and seldom does much
wealth figure on the board.
When, on the present occasion, I entered the gaming-rooms (for the
first time in my life), it was several moments before I could even make
up my mind to play. For one thing, the crowd oppressed me. Had I
been playing for myself, I think I should have left at once, and never
have embarked upon gambling at all, for I could feel my heart
beginning to beat, and my heart was anything but cold-blooded. Also, I
knew, I had long ago made up my mind, that never should I depart
from Roulettenberg until some radical, some final, change had taken

place in my fortunes. Thus, it must and would be. However ridiculous
it may seem to you that I was expecting to win at roulette, I look upon
the generally accepted opinion concerning the folly and the grossness
of hoping to win at gambling as a thing even more absurd. For why is
gambling a whit worse than any other method of acquiring money?
How, for instance, is it worse than trade? True, out of a hundred
persons, only one can win; yet what business is that of yours or of
mine?
At all events, I confined myself at first simply to looking on, and
decided to attempt nothing serious. Indeed, I felt that, if I began to do
anything at all, I should do it in an absent-minded, haphazard sort of
way--of that I felt certain. Also. it behoved me to learn the game itself;
since, despite a thousand descriptions of roulette which I had read with
ceaseless avidity, I knew nothing of its rules, and had never even seen it
played.
In the first place, everything about it seemed to me so foul--so morally
mean and foul. Yet I am not speaking of the hungry, restless folk who,
by scores nay, even by hundreds--could be seen crowded around the
gaming-tables. For in a desire to win quickly and to win much I can see
nothing sordid; I have always applauded the opinion of a certain dead
and gone, but cocksure, moralist who replied to the excuse that " one
may always gamble moderately ", by saying that to do so makes things
worse, since, in that case, the profits too will always be moderate.
Insignificant profits and sumptuous profits do not stand on the same
footing. No, it is all a matter of proportion. What may seem a small
sum to a Rothschild may seem a large sum to me, and it is not the fault
of stakes or of winnings that everywhere men can be found winning,
can be found depriving their fellows of something, just as they do at
roulette. As to the question whether stakes and winnings are, in
themselves, immoral is another question altogether, and I wish to
express no opinion upon it. Yet the very fact that I was full of a strong
desire to win caused this gambling for gain, in spite of its attendant
squalor, to contain, if you will, something intimate, something
sympathetic, to my eyes: for it is always pleasant to see men dispensing
with ceremony, and acting naturally, and in an unbuttoned mood. . . .
Yet, why should I so deceive myself? I could see that the whole thing
was a vain and unreasoning pursuit; and what, at the first glance,

seemed to me the ugliest feature in this mob of roulette players was
their respect for their occupation--the seriousness, and even the
humility, with which they stood around the gaming tables. Moreover, I
had always drawn sharp distinctions between a game which is de
mauvais genre and a game which is permissible to a decent man. In fact,
there are two sorts of gaming--namely, the game of the gentleman and
the game of the plebs--the game for gain, and the game of the herd.
Herein, as said, I draw sharp distinctions. Yet how essentially base are
the distinctions! For instance, a gentleman may stake, say, five or ten
louis d'or--seldom more, unless he is a very rich man, when he may
stake, say, a thousand francs; but, he must do this simply for the love of
the game itself--simply for sport, simply in order to observe the process
of winning or of losing, and, above all things, as a man who remains
quite uninterested in the possibility of his issuing a winner. If he wins,
he will be at liberty, perhaps, to give vent to a laugh, or to pass a
remark on the circumstance to a