The Frogs | Page 2

these.
DIO. How?
XAN. Most unwillingly.
DIO. Does not the donkey bear the load you're bearing?
XAN. Not what I bear myself: by Zeus, not he.
DIO. How can you bear, when you are borne yourself?
XAN. Don't know: but anyhow my shoulder's aching.
DIO. Then since you say the donkey helps you not, You lift him up and carry him in turn.
XAN. O hang it all! why didn't I fight at sea? You should have smarted bitterly for this.
DIO. Get down, you rascal; I've been trudging on Till now I've reached the portal, where I'm going First to turn in. Boy! Boy! I say there, Boy!
HERACLES. Who banged the door? How like a prancing Centaur He drove against it! Mercy o' me, what's this?
DIO. Boy.
XAN. Yes.
DIO. Did you observe?
XAN. What?
DIO. How alarmed He is.
XAN. Aye truly, lest you've lost your wits.
HER. O by Demeter, I can't choose but laugh. Biting my lips won't stop me. Ha! ha! ha!
DIO. Pray you, come hither, I have need of you.
HER. I vow I can't help laughing, I can't help it. A lion's hide upon a yellow silk, a club and buskin! What's it all about? Where were you going?
DIO. I was serving lately aboard the--Cleisthenes.
HER. And fought?
DIO. And sank more than a dozen of the enemy's ships.
HER. You two?
DIO. We two.
HER. And then I awoke, and lo!
DIO. There as, on deck, I'm reading to myself The Andromeda, a sudden pang of longing Shoots through my heart, you can't conceive how keenly.
HER. How big a pang.
DIO. A small one, Molon's size.
HER. Caused by a woman?
DIO. No.
HER. A boy?
DIO. No, no.
HER. A man?
DIO. Ah! ah!
HER. Was it for Cleisthenes?
DIO. Don't mock me, brother; on my life I am In a bad way: such fierce desire consumes me.
HER. Aye, little brother? how?
DIO. I can't describe it. But yet I'll tell you in a riddling way. Have you e'er felt a sudden lust for soup?
HER. Soup! Zeus-a-mercy, yes, ten thousand times.
DIO. Is the thing clear, or must I speak again?
HER. Not of the soup: I'm clear about the soup.
DIO. Well, just that sort of pang devours my heart For lost Euripides.
HER. A dead man too.
DIO. And no one shall persuade me not to go after the man.
HER. Do you mean below, to Hades?
DIO. And lower still, if there's a lower still.
HER. What on earth for?
DIO. I want a genuine poet, "For some are not, and those that are, are bad."
HER. What! does not Iophon live?
DIO. Well, he's the sole Good thing remaining, if even he is good. For even of that I'm not exactly certain.
HER. If go you must, there's Sophocles--he comes Before Euripides--why not take him?
DIO. Not till I've tried if Iophon's coin rings true When he's alone, apart from Sophocles. Besides, Euripides the crafty rogue, Will find a thousand shifts to get away, But he was easy here, is easy there.
HER. But Agathon, where is he?
DIO. He has gone and left us, A genial poet, by his friends much missed.
HER. Gone where?
DIO. To join the blessed in their banquets.
HER. But what of Xenocles?
DIO. O he be hanged!
HER. Pythangelus?
XAN. But never a word of me, Not though my shoulder's chafed so terribly.
HER. But have you not a shoal of little songsters, Tragedians by the myriad, who can chatter A furlong faster than Euripides?
DIO. Those be mere vintage-leavings, jabberers, choirs Of swallow-broods, degraders of their art, Who get one chorus, and are seen no more, The Muses' love once gained. But O my friend, Search where you will, you'll never find a true Creative genius, uttering startling things.
HER. Creative? how do you mean?
DIO. I mean a man Who'll dare some novel venturesome conceit, Air, Zeus's chamber, or Time's foot, or this, 'Twas not my mind that swore: my tongue committed A little perjury on its own account.
HER. You like that style?
DIO. Like it? I dote upon it.
HER. I vow it's ribald nonsense, and you know it.
DIO. "Rule not my mind": you've got a house to mind.
HER. Really and truly though 'tis paltry stuff.
DIO. Teach me to dine!
XAN. But never a word of me.
DIO. But tell me truly--'twas for this I came Dressed up to mimic you--what friends received And entertained you when you went below To bring back Cerberus, in case I need them. And tell me too the havens, fountains, shops, Roads, resting-places, stews, refreshment rooms, Towns, lodgings, hostesses, with whom were found The fewest bugs.
XAN. But never a word of me.
HER. You are really game to go?
DIO. O drop that, can't you? And tell me this: of all the roads you know Which is the quickest way to get to Hades? I want one not too warm, nor yet too cold.
HER. Which shall I tell you first? which shall it be? There's one by rope and bench: you launch away And--hang yourself.
DIO. No thank you: that's too stifling.
HER. Then there's a