The Foundations | Page 5

likes everybody, and Mother likes everybody,
except the people who don't like Daddy. I bar Miss Stokes, of course;
but then, who wouldn't?
JAMES. [With a touch of philosophy] That's right--we all bars them
that tries to get something out of us.
L. ANNE. Who do you bar, James?
JAMES. Well--[Enjoying the luxury of thought]--Speaking generally, I
bar everybody that looks down their noses at me. Out there in the

trenches, there'd come a shell, and orf'd go some orficer's head, an' I'd
think: That might ha' been me--we're all equal in the sight o' the stars.
But when I got home again among the torfs, I says to meself: Out there,
ye know, you filled a hole as well as me; but here you've put it on again,
with mufti.
L. ANNE. James, are your breeches made of mufti?
JAMES. [Contemplating his legs with a certain contempt] Ah!
Footmen were to ha' been off; but Lord William was scared we
wouldn't get jobs in the rush. We're on his conscience, and it's on my
conscience that I've been on his long enough--so, now I've saved a bit,
I'm goin' to take meself orf it.
L. ANNE. Oh! Are you going? Where?
JAMES. [Assembling the last bottles] Out o' Blighty!
L. ANNE. Is a little blighter a little Englishman?
JAMES. [Embarrassed] Well-'e can be.
L. ANNE [Mining] James--we're quite safe down here, aren't we, in a
revolution? Only, we wouldn't have fun. Which would you rather--be
safe, or have fun?
JAMES. [Grimly] Well, I had my bit o' fun in the war.
L. ANNE. I like fun that happens when you're not looking.
JAMES. Do you? You'd ha' been just suited.
L. ANNE. James, is there a future life? Miss Stokes says so.
JAMES. It's a belief, in the middle classes.
L. ANNE. What are the middle classes?
JAMES. Anything from two 'undred a year to supertax.
L. ANNE. Mother says they're terrible. Is Miss Stokes middle class?
JAMES. Yes.
L. ANNE. Then I expect they are terrible. She's awfully virtuous,
though, isn't she?
JAMES. 'Tisn't so much the bein' virtuous, as the lookin' it, that's awful.
L. ANNE. Are all the middle classes virtuous? Is Poulder?
JAMES. [Dubiously] Well. Ask him!
L. ANNE. Yes, I will. Look!
[From an empty bin on the ground level she picks up a lighted
taper,--burnt almost to the end.]
JAMES. [Contemplating it] Careless!
L. Ate. Oh! And look! [She paints to a rounded metal object lying in

the bin, close to where the taper was] It's a bomb!
She is about to pick it up when JAMES takes her by the waist and puts
her aside.
JAMES. [Sternly] You stand back, there! I don't like the look o' that!
L. ANNE. [With intense interest] Is it really a bomb? What fun!
JAMES. Go and fetch Poulder while I keep an eye on it.
L. ANNE. [On tiptoe of excitement] If only I can make him jump! Oh,
James! we needn't put the light out, need we?
JAMES. No. Clear off and get him, and don't you come back.
L. ANNE. Oh! but I must! I found it!
JAMES. Cut along.
L. ANNE. Shall we bring a bucket?
JAMES. Yes. [ANNE flies off.]
[Gazing at the object] Near go! Thought I'd seen enough o'them to last
my time. That little gas blighter! He looked a rum 'un, too--one o' these
'ere Bolshies.
[In the presence of this grim object the habits of the past are too much
for him. He sits on the ground, leaning against one of the bottle baskets,
keeping his eyes on the bomb, his large, lean, gorgeous body spread,
one elbow on his plush knee. Taking out an empty pipe, he places it
mechanically, bowl down, between his dips. There enter, behind him,
as from a communication trench, POULDER, in swallow-tails, with
LITTLE ANNE behind him.]
L. ANNE. [Peering round him--ecstatic] Hurrah! Not gone off yet! It
can't--can it--while James is sitting on it?
POULDER. [Very broad and stout, with square shoulders,--a large
ruddy face, and a small mouth] No noise, Miss.--James.
JAMES. Hallo!
POULDER. What's all this?
JAMES. Bomb!
POULDER. Miss Anne, off you go, and don't you----
L. ANNE. Come back again! I know! [She flies.]
JAMES. [Extending his hand with the pipe in it] See!
POULDER. [Severely] You've been at it again! Look here, you're not
in the trenches now. Get up! What are your breeches goin' to be like?
You might break a bottle any moment!
JAMES. [Rising with a jerk to a sort of "Attention!"] Look here, you

starched antiquity, you and I and that bomb are here in the sight of the
stars. If you don't look out I'll stamp on it and blow us all to glory!
Drop your civilian swank!
POULDER. [Seeing red] Ho! Because