The Follies of Love | Page 9

Don't get carried away! Observe tranquilly if love has made you
a charming object. Your features are worn away--hers are loveable and
fresh. She has a well made wit and you a crabbed temper. She's not
sixteen, and you are very old. She bears herself well, and you walk with
a cane. She has all her teeth, which makes her pretty, and you have only
one. Still, she excites you--and you ought to be carried off at the first
cough to whatever misfortune down there would please you.
Albert I've taken useless trouble to please her. I will therefore merit her
hate, by God. And to secure her dangerous charms, I am going to lead
her to a place far from fops, where by her arrogance, she will have
leisure to be penitent. Come quickly, let's go.
Arabella Where are you going?
Albert You will know soon enough. March on--no talking. (perceiving
Worthy, who has just entered) What an irritating turn of events at this
time. To the devil with him and his stupid face.
(Worthy, who was entering like someone out for a stroll, sees Albert
and greets him. Scratch enters behind Worthy.)
Albert Sir, do you wish something from me?
Jenny (low, to Arabella) It's Worthy.
Arabella (low) Peace! I see him more clearly than you.
(Worthy continues to bow to Albert.)
Albert Sir, what's the use of these fine manners? Speak, I am tired of
bowing and scraping.
Worthy A stranger in these parts, and pleased to see you. In paying you
my respects, I fulfill my duty. My coach is broken down near your
mansion, and after having done my best to repair it, I came to breathe
the delicious air--attracted by the--freshness.
Albert You deceive yourself, sir. The air around here is decidedly bad
for your health. I owe it to myself to tell you that you will become very
ill if you stay here for a long time. It is dangerous and mortal to
wayfarers.
Arabella Alas, nothing is more true. Since I've breathed this air, I
languish night and day in a cruel martyrdom.
Scratch Just give me the same wine as our innkeeper broke open today,
and I will stand my ground defying fever, apoplexy, and a hundred
years of age to the end of my life.
Worthy (to Arabella) It's hard to believe that with so much beauty, and

such air, that you're not healthy.
Albert Whether she looks well or ill, find another place to take the air.
Worthy This object--that heaven has taken care in making--this view
where my eye is pleased to rest, enchants my sight--and never has
nature displayed her attentions with so much finery. My heart is in love
with what it sees here.
Albert Yes, the country is beautiful. Everybody says so, but you'll
spend the end of your day better elsewhere. By now, your coach must
be fixed. There's no need for your presence here. Leave, you ought to
be gone already.
Worthy I will leave momentarily. Tell me, I beg you--
Albert Since you chatter so emotionally, I am going to listen to you
attentively. (to Jenny and Arabella) Go in, go in.
Jenny Sir--
Albert Eh! Go in, I tell you.
Worthy I'd rather retire than be the cause of Madame suffering the least
inconvenience on my account.
Arabella No, sir, stay till tomorrow. Postpone going on your way, and
we will put you in good company. The roads are unlucky and filthy.
Albert So much ceremony! Come, quickly--go in.
Jenny Yes, yes, I'm going in. But, before these gentlemen, I tell you
plainly to stop the humiliations you impose on us. We haven't seen
even the shadow of a hat for six months in this new fangled cloister.
Any man who comes around here is interdicted. Everything in this
house is subject to inspection. Sometimes we think the world has come
to an end. No one comes her except they be of the female sex. Judge if
a girl in this situation has cause to complain.
Albert (putting his hand over her mouth and forcing her inside) Ah, I
will tear out your viper's tongue.
(Exit Jenny and Arabella.)
Albert (aside) I don't want to go back in so soon. Their complaints and
their tears might move me, perhaps. (aloud) What's the problem? Speak!
But, above all, be brief.
Worthy I am truly annoyed that, on account of me, your daughter has
received such unworthy treatment.
Albert What do you mean, my daughter?
Worthy Is she your wife then?

Albert She soon will be.
Worthy My soul is ravished. You couldn't form a better plan. And you
do well to get that viper in hand. All husbands ought to do as you do.
Women today are such coquettes.
Albert I intend to rule