The First of April | Page 7

instruments of Vice,
The treacherous Cards and desolating
Dice,
Which forc'd the noble Gamester, for support,
To claim the
mercies of a pitying Court.
The flatter'd Queen beheld, with laughing eye,
The Offerings of her
faithful Votary;
And, in return, she gave a Scroll, which bore
On its
smooth face the _trusty_ name of H----,
And other monied Wights,
who boast to reign
O'er L----'s flow'ry lawns and proud domain:

Which when he saw, for WINE he call'd aloud,
And stagger'd onward
through the yielding Croud.
But, as I look'd, methought, beneath the gate,

Counting her dropping
tears, REPENTANCE sat:
And as the giddy Votaries return'd,
They
caught her sorrows, and their follies mourn'd.

Bold M---- offer'd up his patriot zeal,
And flaming Harangues for
BRITANNIA'S weal;
And _Oaths_[d] by which he swore to stem the
tide
Of Courtly Sway and Ministerial Pride;
Which thro' the
ecchoing Isle were frequent heard,
When he a _Northern Candidate
appear'd_.
But FOLLY gave him, with satiric look,
A
_Dispensation_ from the Oaths he took;
Suspicious that, the patriot
frenzy o'er,
These pious _Swearings_ had been _broke before_.
Smiles that ne'er pleas'd, and words as light as air, Which scarce could
claim regard from FOLLY'S ear;
O'er-weening arts, which, tho' in
smiles array'd,
By base-born fears have ever been betray'd;
A few
fair deeds, whose merit has been lost
In _selfish_ ends, or _Pharisaic_
boast;
Soft, gentle Phrases, and meek, smiling Lies,
Which could
not veil his bare hypocrisies;
Dull hours of _Courtship_ with the
_unwilling_ Fair,
Who wonder'd _rosy Love was never there_;

Curses pour'd forth upon the nuptial hour,
Which sadly _fail'd him of
the expected Dower_[e];
All these and more the splendid Shrine
display'd,
By B----'s trembling hand with caution laid.
Now FOLLY frown'd, _who had not frown'd before_;
And, as I
thought, in her right hand she bore
A Parchment Scroll, which strait
she downward threw,
For the pale, timorous Lordling to review.
A
Will it seem'd;--and soon, with weeping eye,
He told aloud _th'
omitted Legacy_[f].
_Then_ FOLLY _titter'd_[g], and the joyful Croud
Burst forth in
laughing shouts so shrill and loud,
The affrighted vision fled in haste
away,
And my glad eyes beheld the chearful day.
[Footnote a: [_His S----r's Fate._]--If the Reader should think I have
strayed beyond the line of propriety in introducing a Family so
_profitably_ employed as this, into the _Temple of Folly_,--I shall beg
leave to refer him to a _sacred Book_ which this Family pretend to read
with great care and attention; wherein he will perceive that the
_wisdom of this world_, with which this Family so much abounds, is

accounted _foolishness_.--Tho', if he should object to _Scripture_
authority, he will find, in the _laugh_ and _contempt_ of Mankind, the
real folly of those who, in the midst of affluence, by the most bare-fac'd
and indelicate proceedings, obtain and continue to grasp at every means
of _domestic emolument_.]
[Footnote b: [And the _flow L----_.]--I do not allude to this noble
person's capacity,--but to his _great and well-known Indispositions to
this Connection_.]
[Footnote c: [_to break through every golden-rule_.] This woman, as an
example of the good effects of _a prudential_ and _parsimonious_
education, the moment she was let loose, run into the extreme of Folly
and expensive Fashions.--It has been said of one of her sisters, that she
never spoke before her marriage, and was never silent

afterwards.--This is the true art of managing Daughters--To prevent a
discovery of their real dispositions 'till the end of the hypocrisy is
answer'd,--and the _Settlement for Life_ irrevocable.]
[Footnote d: [_And Oaths by which he swore_.] At the last General
Election, it was consider'd as a certain road to success by the Patriotic
Candidates for the Senatorial Dignity, to propose and take oaths to
support certain _wise_ measures, and to endeavour at the Repeal of
certain _dangerous_ Laws. This person was among the outrageous
Partisans of Opposition, who, at that time, look the propos'd oaths with
great noise and clamour in various parts of the Kingdom: But his
success was not then equal to that which he has since found, without
any _public engagements_, beneath the smile of Ministerial
favour.--But I do not mean, indeed I have no right to express myself
with severity at this change of Party;--I will not add _Sentiments_;--for
they are in the secret recesses of his own breast.--Nor shall I endeavour,
at present, to develope the turnings and windings of that course which
many of our Modern Patriots have taken.--These things will, in due
time, explain themselves.--The Right Honourable Captain fought and
found an empty Renown among the Frozen Seas of the _North_.--Some
more substantial Honours seem to await him here.--I do not despair of
seeing him _a Lord of the Admiralty_.--The Noble Relation to whom

he owes the rudiments of naval wisdom, may also have communicated
to him that subtle Spirit, which, in spite of Private Connections, Family
Dissentions, Public Engagements, and Ministerial Confusion, looks
alone to, and will maintain its own Interests.]
[Footnote e: [_th' expected Dower._]--The Anecdote to which this
relates is known