The First Hundred Thousand

The First Hundred Thousand

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Hay
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Title: The First Hundred Thousand
Author: Ian Hay
Release Date: July 10, 2004 [eBook #12877]
Language: English
Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
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HUNDRED THOUSAND***
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THE FIRST HUNDRED THOUSAND
Being the Unofficial Chronicle of a Unit of "K(1)"

BY
IAN HAY

[Illustration: CAPTAIN IAN HAY BEITH]

By Ian Hay
PIP: A ROMANCE OF YOUTH. GETTING TOGETHER. THE
FIRST HUNDRED THOUSAND. SCALLY: THE STORY OF A
PERFECT GENTLEMAN. With Frontispiece. A KNIGHT ON
WHEELS. HAPPY-GO-LUCKY. Illustrated by Charles E. Brock. A
SAFETY MATCH. With frontispiece. A MAN'S MAN. With
frontispiece. THE RIGHT STUFF. With frontispiece.

TO MY WIFE

PUBLISHERS' NOTE
The "Junior Sub," who writes the following account of the experiences
of some of the first hundred thousand of Kitchener's army, is, as the
title-page of the volume now reveals, Ian Hay Beith, author of those
deservedly popular novels, _The Right Stuff, A Man's Man, A Safety
Match, and Happy-Go-Lucky_.
Captain Beith, who was born in 1876 and therefore narrowly came
within the age limit for military service, enlisted at the first outbreak of
hostilities in the summer of 1914, and was made a sub-lieutenant in the
Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders. After training throughout the fall
and winter at Aldershot, he accompanied his regiment to the front in
April, and, as his narrative discloses, immediately saw some very
active service and rapidly rose to the rank of captain. In the offensive of
September, Captain Beith's division was badly cut up and seriously

reduced in numbers. He has lately been transferred to a machine-gun
division, and "for some mysterious reason"--as he characteristically
puts it in a letter to his publishers,--has been recommended for the
military cross.
The story of The First Hundred Thousand was originally contributed in
the form of an anonymous narrative to Blackwood's Magazine. Writing
to his publishers, last May, Captain Beith describes the circumstances
under which it was written:--
"I write this from the stone floor of an outhouse, where the pig meal is
first accumulated and then boiled up at a particularly smelly French
farm, which is saying a good deal. It is a most interesting life, and if I
come through the present unpleasantness I shall have enough copy to
last me twenty years. Meanwhile, I am using Blackwood's Magazine as
a safety-valve under a pseudonym."
It is these "safety-valve" papers that are here offered to the American
public in their completeness,--a picture of the great struggle uniquely
rich in graphic human detail.
4 PARK STREET

CONTENTS
BOOK ONE BLANK CARTRIDGES
I. AB OVO II. THE DAILY GRIND III. GROWING PAINS IV. THE
CONVERSION OF PRIVATE M'SLATTERY V. "CRIME" VI. THE
LAWS OF THE MEDES AND PERSIANS VII. SHOOTING
STRAIGHT VIII. BILLETS IX. MID-CHANNEL X. DEEDS OF
DARKNESS XI. OLYMPUS XII. ... AND SOME FELL BY THE
WAYSIDE XIII. CONCERT PITCH
BOOK TWO LIVE ROUNDS
XIV. THE BACK OF THE FRONT XV. IN THE TRENCHES--AN

OFF-DAY XVI. "DIRTY WORK AT THE CROSS-ROADS
TO-NIGHT" XVII. THE NEW WARFARE XVIII. THE FRONT OF
THE FRONT XIX. THE TRIVIAL ROUND XX. THE GATHERING
OF THE EAGLES XXI. THE BATTLE OF THE SLAG-HEAPS

"K(1)"
_We do not deem ourselves A 1, We have no past: we cut no dash: Nor
hope, when launched against the Hun, To raise a more than moderate
splash.
But yesterday, we said farewell To plough; to pit; to dock; to mill. For
glory? Drop it! Why? Oh, well-- To have a slap at Kaiser Bill.
And now to-day has come along. With rifle, haversack, and pack,
We're off, a hundred thousand strong. And--some of us will not come
back.
But all we ask, if that befall, Is this. Within your hearts be writ This
single-line memorial_:-- He did his duty--and his bit!

NOTE
The reader is hereby cautioned against regarding this narrative as an
official history of the Great War.
The following pages are merely a record of some of the personal
adventures of a typical regiment of Kitchener's Army.
The chapters were written from day to day, and published from month
to month. Consequently, prophecy is occasionally falsified, and
opinions moderated, in subsequent pages.
The characters are entirely fictitious, but the incidents described all
actually occurred.

BOOK ONE
BLANK CARTRIDGES

The First Hundred Thousand
I
AB OVO
"Squoad--'Shun! Move to the right in fours. Forrm--fourrrs!"
The audience addressed looks up with languid curiosity,