The Essays, vol 9 | Page 9

tenderly of it, and even amongst the
Stoics there are some who advise folks to give themselves sometimes
the liberty to drink, nay, to drunkenness, to refresh the soul:
"Hoc quoque virtutum quondam certamine, magnum Socratem palmam
promeruisse ferunt."
["In this trial of power formerly they relate that the great Socrates
deserved the palm."--Cornet. Gallus, Ep., i. 47.]
That censor and reprover of others, Cato, was reproached that he was a
hard drinker:
"Narratur et prisci Catonis Saepe mero caluisse virtus."
["And of old Cato it is said, that his courage was often warmed with
wine."--Horace, Od., xxi. 3, 11.--Cato the Elder.]
Cyrus, that so renowned king, amongst the other qualities by which he
claimed to be preferred before his brother Artaxerxes, urged this
excellence, that he could drink a great deal more than he. And in the
best governed nations this trial of skill in drinking is very much in use.

I have heard Silvius, an excellent physician of Paris, say that lest the
digestive faculties of the stomach should grow idle, it were not amiss
once a month to rouse them by this excess, and to spur them lest they
should grow dull and rusty; and one author tells us that the Persians
used to consult about their most important affairs after being well
warmed with wine.
My taste and constitution are greater enemies to this vice than my
discourse; for besides that I easily submit my belief to the authority of
ancient opinions, I look upon it indeed as an unmanly and stupid vice,
but less malicious and hurtful than the others, which, almost all, more
directly jostle public society. And if we cannot please ourselves but it
must cost us something, as they hold, I find this vice costs a man's
conscience less than the others, besides that it is of no difficult
preparation, nor hard to be found, a consideration not altogether to be
despised. A man well advanced both in dignity and age, amongst three
principal commodities that he said remained to him of life, reckoned to
me this for one, and where would a man more justly find it than
amongst the natural conveniences? But he did not take it right, for
delicacy and the curious choice of wines is therein to be avoided. If you
found your pleasure upon drinking of the best, you condemn yourself to
the penance of drinking of the worst. Your taste must be more
indifferent and free; so delicate a palate is not required to make a good
toper. The Germans drink almost indifferently of all wines with delight;
their business is to pour down and not to taste; and it's so much the
better for them: their pleasure is so much the more plentiful and nearer
at hand.
Secondly, to drink, after the French fashion, but at two meals, and then
very moderately, is to be too sparing of the favours of the god. There is
more time and constancy required than so. The ancients spent whole
nights in this exercise, and ofttimes added the day following to eke it
out, and therefore we are to take greater liberty and stick closer to our
work. I have seen a great lord of my time, a man of high enterprise and
famous success, that without setting himself to't, and after his ordinary
rate of drinking at meals, drank not much less than five quarts of wine,
and at his going away appeared but too wise and discreet, to the

detriment of our affairs. The pleasure we hold in esteem for the course
of our lives ought to have a greater share of our time dedicated to it; we
should, like shopboys and labourers, refuse no occasion nor omit any
opportunity of drinking, and always have it in our minds. Methinks we
every day abridge and curtail the use of wine, and that the after
breakfasts, dinner snatches, and collations I used to see in my father's
house, when I was a boy, were more usual and frequent then than now.
Is it that we pretend to a reformation? Truly, no: but it may be we are
more addicted to Venus than our fathers were. They are two exercises
that thwart and hinder one another in their vigour. Lechery weakens our
stomach on the one side; and on the other sobriety renders us more
spruce and amorous for the exercise of love.
'Tis wonderful what strange stories I have heard my father tell of the
chastity of that age wherein he lived. It was for him to say it, being
both by art and nature cut out and finished for the service of ladies. He
spoke well and little: ever mixing his language with some illustration
out of authors most in use, especially in Spanish, and among the
Spanish he