The Duke of Stockbridge | Page 7

they be ten
lawyers in Stockbridge taown a'ready, an they warn't but one wen I wuz
a boy, an thar wuz more settlers 'n they be naow."
"Wal, I guess they'll git nuff to dew," said Ezra Phelps. "I hearn as
haow they's seven hundred cases on the docket o' the Common Pleas,
nex' week, mos' on em fer debt."
"I hearn as two hundred on em be from Stockbridge an the iron-works,"
added Israel. "I declare for't Zadkiel 'll hev plenty o' kumpny daown
tew jail, by the time them suits be all tried."
"By gosh, what be we a comin tew?" groaned Abner. "It doos seem zif
we all on us mout z'well move daown tew the jail to onc't, an hev done
with 't. We're baown to come to 't fuss or las'."
Presently Peleg Bidwell said, "My sister Keziah's son, by her fuss
husban's been daown tew Bosting, an I hearn say ez haow he says ez

the folks daown East mos'ly all hez furniter from Lunnon, and the
women wears them air Leghorn hats as cos ten shillin lawful, let alone
prunelly shoes an satin stockins, an he says as there ain't a ship goes out
o' Bosting harbor ez don' take more'n five thousan paound o' lawful
money outer the kentry. I callate," pursued Peleg, "that's jess what's tew
the bottom o' the trouble. It's all long o' the rich folks a sendin money
out o' the kentry to git theirselves fine duds, an that's wy we don' git
more'n tuppence a paound fer our mutton, an nex' ter nothin fer wheat,
an don't have nothin to pay taxes with nor to settle with Squire Edwards,
daown ter the store. That's the leak in the bar'l, an times won't git no
better till that's plugged naow, I tell yew."
"If't comes to pluggin leaks ye kin look nigher hum nor Bosting,"
observed Abner. "I hearn ez Squire Woodbridge giv fifty pound lawful
fer that sorter tune box ez he'z get fer his gal, an they doos say ez them
cheers o' Squire Sedgwick's cos twenty pound lawful in the old kentry."
"What dew they call that air tune box?" inquired Israel Goodrich. "I've
hearn tell but I kinder fergit. It's some Frenchified soundin name."
"It's a pianner," said Obadiah.
"I guess peeanner's nigher right," observed Peleg critically. "My gal
hearn the Edwards gal call it peeanner."
"They ain't nuther of ye in a mile o' right. 'Tain't pianner, an 'tain't
peeanner; it's pianny," said Abner, who on account of having once
served a few weeks in connection with a detachment of the French
auxiliaries, was conceded to be an authority on foreign pronunciation.
"I hain't got no idee on't, nohow," said Israel shaking his head. "I hearn
it a goin ez I wuz a comin by the store. Souns like ez if it wuz a hailin
ontew a lot o' milk pans. I never suspicioned ez I should live tew hear
sech a n'ise."
"I guess Peleg's baout right," said Abner. "Thar won't be no show fer
poor folks, 'nless they is a law agin' sendin money aouter the kentry."

"I callate that would be a shuttin of the barn door arter the hoss is
stole," said Ezra Phelps, as he arrested a mug of flip on its way to his
lips, to express his views. "There ain' no use o' beginnin to save arter
all's spent. I callate guvment's got ter print a big stack o' new bills ef
we're a goin to git holt o' no money."
"Ef it's paper bills as ye're a talkin baout," said Abner grimly, "I've got
quite a slew on em tew hum, mebbe a peck or tew. I got em fer pay in
the army. They're tew greasy tew kindle a fire with, an I dunno o'
nothin else ez they're good for. Ye're welcome to em, Ezry. My little
Bijah assed me fer some on em tew make a kite outer thuther day, an I
says tew him, says I, 'Bijah, I don' callate they'll do nohow fer a kite,
for I never hearn of a Continental bill a goin up, but ef yer want a
sinker fer yer fish line they're jess the thing.'"
There was a sardonic snicker at Ezra's expense, but he returned to the
charge quite undismayed.
"That ain't nuther here nor there," he said, turning toward Abner and
emphasizing his words with the empty mug. "What I asses yew is,
wan't them bills good fer suthin wen they wuz fuss printed?"
"They wuz wuth suthin fer a wile," assented Abner.
"Ezackly," said the other, "that's the nater o' bills. Allers they is good
fer a wile and then they kinder begins to run daown, an they runs
daown till they ain't wuth