The Complete Plays of Gilbert and Sullivan | Page 5

la, la, etc.
ALL. Fate in this has put his finger-- Let us bow to Fate's decree, Then
no longer let us linger, To the altar hurry we!
(They all dance off two and two--Gianetta with Marco, Tessa with
Giuseppe.)
(Flourish. A gondola arrives at the Piazzetta steps, from which enter the
Duke of Plaza-toro, the Duchess, their daughter Casilda, and their
attendant Luiz, who carries a drum. All are dressed in pompous but old
and faded clothes.)
(Entrance of Duke, Duchess, Casilda, and Luiz.)
DUKE. From the sunny Spanish shore, The Duke of Plaza-Tor!--
DUCH. And His Grace's Duchess true--
CAS. And His Grace's daughter, too--
LUIZ. And His Grace's private drum To Venetia's shores have come:
ALL. If ever, ever, ever They get back to Spain, They will never, never,
never Cross the sea again--
DUKE. Neither that Grandee from the Spanish shore, The noble Duke
of Plaza-Tor'--
DUCH. Nor His Grace's Duchess, staunch and true--
CAS. You may add, His Grace's daughter, too--
LUIZ. Nor His Grace's own particular drum To Venetia's shores will
come:
ALL. If ever, ever, ever They get back to Spain, They will never, never,
never Cross the sea again!
DUKE. At last we have arrived at our destination. This is the Ducal
Palace, and it is here that the Grand Inquisitor resides. As a Castilian
hidalgo of ninety-five quarterings, I regret that I am unable to pay my
state visit on a horse. As a Castilian hidalgo of that description, I

should have preferred to ride through the streets of Venice; but owing, I
presume, to an unusually wet season, the streets are in such a condition
that equestrian exercise is impracticable. No matter. Where is our suite?
LUIZ (coming forward). Your Grace, I am here. DUCH. Why do you
not do yourself the honour to kneel when you address His Grace?
DUKE. My love, it is so small a matter! (To Luiz.) Still, you may as
well do it. (Luiz kneels.) CAS. The young man seems to entertain but
an imperfect appreciation of the respect due from a menial to a
Castilian hidalgo. DUKE. My child, you are hard upon our suite. CAS.
Papa, I've no patience with the presumption of persons in his plebeian
position. If he does not appreciate that position, let him be whipped
until he does. DUKE. Let us hope the omission was not intended as a
slight. I should be much hurt if I thought it was. So would he. (To Luiz.)
Where are the halberdiers who were to have had the honour of meeting
us here, that our visit to the Grand Inquisitor might be made in
becoming state? LUIZ. Your Grace, the halberdiers are mercenary
people who stipulated for a trifle on account. DUKE. How tiresome!
Well, let us hope the Grand Inquisitor is a blind gentleman. And the
band who were to have had the honour of escorting us? I see no band!
LUIZ. Your Grace, the band are sordid persons who required to be paid
in advance. DUCH. That's so like a band! DUKE (annoyed).
Insuperable difficulties meet me at every turn! DUCH. But surely they
know His Grace? LUIZ. Exactly--they know His Grace. DUKE. Well,
let us hope that the Grand Inquisitor is a deaf gentleman. A
cornet-a-piston would be something. You do not happen to possess the
accomplishment of tootling like a cornet-a-piston? LUIZ. Alas, no,
Your Grace! But I can imitate a farmyard. DUKE (doubtfully). I don't
see how that would help us. I don't see how we could bring it in. CAS.
It would not help us in the least. We are not a parcel of graziers come to
market, dolt! (Luiz rises.) DUKE. My love, our suite's feelings! (To
Luiz.) Be so good as to ring the bell and inform the Grand Inquisitor
that his Grace the Duke of Plaza-Toro, Count Matadoro, Baron
Picadoro-- DUCH. And suite-- DUKE. And suite--have arrived at
Venice, and seek-- CAS. Desire-- DUCH. Demand! DUKE. And
demand an audience. LUIZ. Your Grace has but to command. DUKE
(much moved). I felt sure of it--I felt sure of it! (Exit Luiz into Ducal
Palace.) And now, my love--(aside to Duchess) Shall we tell her? I

think so--(aloud to Casilda) And now, my love, prepare for a
magnificent surprise. It is my agreeable duty to reveal to you a secret
which should make you the happiest young lady in Venice! CAS. A
secret? DUCH. A secret which, for State reasons, it has been necessary
to preserve for twenty years. DUKE. When you were a prattling babe
of six months old you were married by proxy to no less a personage
than the infant son and heir of His Majesty the immeasurably wealthy
King of Barataria! CAS. Married to the infant son of the King of
Barataria?