The Acharnians | Page 4

his pocket. The old man tastes and tries, special terms are
arranged, and the play concludes with a riotous and uproarious rustic

feast in honour of the blessings of Peace and Plenty.
Incidentally excellent fun is poked at Euripides and his dramatic
methods, which supply matter for so much witty badinage in several
others of our author's pieces.
Other specially comic incidents are: the scene where the two young
daughters of the famished Megarian are sold in the market at Athens as
suck[l]ing-pigs--a scene in which the convenient similarity of the Greek
words signifying a pig and the 'pudendum muliebre' respectively is
utilized in a whole string of ingenious and suggestive 'double entendres'
and ludicrous jokes; another where the Informer, or Market-Spy, is
packed up in a crate as crockery and carried off home by the Boeotian
buyer.
The drama takes its title from the Chorus, composed of old men of
Acharnae.

DRAMATIS PERSONAE
DICAEOPOLIS HERALD AMPHITHEUS AMBASSADORS
PSEUDARTABAS THEORUS WIFE OF DICAEOPOLIS
DAUGHTER OF DICAEOPOLIS EURIPIDES CEPHISOPHON,
servant of Euripides LAMACHUS ATTENDANT OF LAMACHUS A
MEGARIAN MAIDENS, daughters of the Megarian A BOEOTIAN
NICARCHUS A HUSBANDMAN A BRIDESMAID AN INFORMER
MESSENGERS CHORUS OF ACHARNIAN ELDERS

SCENE: The Athenian Ecclesia on the Pnyx; afterwards Dicaeopolis'
house in the country.

DICAEOPOLIS[1] (alone) What cares have not gnawed at my heart
and how few have been the pleasures in my life! Four, to be exact,
while my troubles have been as countless as the grains of sand on the
shore! Let me see! of what value to me have been these few pleasures?
Ah! I remember that I was delighted in soul when Cleon had to
disgorge those five talents;[2] I was in ecstasy and I love the Knights
for this deed; 'it is an honour to Greece.'[3] But the day when I was
impatiently awaiting a piece by Aeschylus,[4] what tragic despair it
caused me when the herald called, "Theognis,[5] introduce your

Chorus!" Just imagine how this blow struck straight at my heart! On the
other hand, what joy Dexitheus caused me at the musical competition,
when he played a Boeotian melody on the lyre! But this year by
contrast! Oh! what deadly torture to hear Chaeris[6] perform the
prelude in the Orthian mode![7] --Never, however, since I began to
bathe, has the dust hurt my eyes as it does to-day. Still it is the day of
assembly; all should be here at daybreak, and yet the Pnyx[8] is still
deserted. They are gossiping in the marketplace, slipping hither and
thither to avoid the vermilioned rope.[9] The Prytanes[10] even do not
come; they will be late, but when they come they will push and fight
each other for a seat in the front row. They will never trouble
themselves with the question of peace. Oh! Athens! Athens! As for
myself, I do not fail to come here before all the rest, and now, finding
myself alone, I groan, yawn, stretch, break wind, and know not what to
do; I make sketches in the dust, pull out my loose hairs, muse, think of
my fields, long for peace, curse town life and regret my dear country
home,[11] which never told me to 'buy fuel, vinegar or oil'; there the
word 'buy,' which cuts me in two, was unknown; I harvested everything
at will. Therefore I have come to the assembly fully prepared to bawl,
interrupt and abuse the speakers, if they talk of anything but peace. But
here come the Prytanes, and high time too, for it is midday! As I
foretold, hah! is it not so? They are pushing and fighting for the front
seats.
f[1] A name invented by Aristophanes and signifying 'a just citizen.' f[2]
Clean had received five talents from the islanders subject to Athens, on
condition that he should get the tribute payable by them reduced; when
informed of this transaction, the knights compelled him to return the
money. f[3] A hemistich borrowed from Euripides' 'Telephus.' f[4] The
tragedies of Aeschylus continued to be played even after the poet's
death, which occurred in 436 B.C., ten years before the production of
'The Acharnians.' f[5] A tragic poet, whose pieces were so devoid of
warmth and life that he was nicknamed [the Greek for] 'snow.' f[6] A
bad musician, frequently ridiculed by Aristophanes; he played both the
lyre and the flute. f[7] A lively and elevated method. f[8] A hill near
the Acropolis, where the Assemblies were held. f[9] Several means
were used to force citizens to attend the assemblies; the shops were
closed; circulation was only permitted in those streets which led to the

Pnyx; finally, a rope covered with vermilion was drawn round those
who dallied in the Agora (the market-place), and the late-comers, ear-
marked by the imprint of the rope, were fined. f[10] Magistrates