protection of God, O
damsel, am I Commander of the Faithful?" "Yes, indeed," answered
she; "by the protection of God thou in this time art Commander of the
Faithful." Quoth he, "By Allah, thou liest, O thousandfold strumpet!"
Then he turned to the chief eunuch and called to him, whereupon he
came to him and kissing the earth before him, said, "Yes, O
Commander of the Faithful." "Who is Commander of the Faithful?"
asked Aboulhusn. "Thou," replied the eunuch and Aboulhusn said,
"Thou liest, thousandfold catamite that thou art!" Then he turned to
another eunuch and said to him, "O my chief,[FN#20] by the protection
of God, am I Commander of the Faithful?" "Ay, by Allah, O my lord!"
answered he. "Thou in this time art Commander of the Faithful and
Vicar of the Lord of the Worlds." Aboulhusn laughed at himself and
misdoubted of his reason and was perplexed at what he saw and said,
"In one night I am become Khalif! Yesterday I was Aboulhusn the Wag,
and to-day I am Commander of the Faithful." Then the chief eunuch
came up to him and said, "O Commander of the Faithful, (the name of
God encompass thee!) thou art indeed Commander of the Faithful and
Vicar of the Lord of the Worlds!" And the slave-girls and eunuchs
came round about him, till he arose and abode wondering at his case.
Presently, one of the slave-girls brought him a pair of sandals wrought
with raw silk and green silk and embroidered with red gold, and he
took them and put them in his sleeve, whereat the slave cried out and
said, "Allah! Allah! O my lord, these are sandals for the treading of thy
feet, so thou mayst enter the draught-house." Aboulhusn was
confounded and shaking the sandals from his sleeve, put them on his
feet, whilst the Khalif [well-nigh] died of laughter at him. The slave
forewent him to the house of easance, where he entered and doing his
occasion, came out into the chamber, whereupon the slave- girls
brought him a basin of gold and an ewer of silver and poured water on
his hands and he made the ablution.
Then they spread him a prayer-carpet and he prayed. Now he knew not
how to pray and gave not over bowing and prostrating himself, [till he
had prayed the prayers] of twenty inclinations,[FN#21] pondering in
himself the while and saying, "By Allah, I am none other than the
Commander of the Faithful in very sooth! This is assuredly no dream,
for all these things happen not in a dream." And he was convinced and
determined in himself that he was Commander of the Faithful; so he
pronounced the Salutation[FN#22] and made an end[FN#23] of his
prayers; whereupon the slaves and slave-girls came round about him
with parcels of silk and stuffs[FN#24] and clad him in the habit of the
Khalifate and gave him the royal dagger in his hand. Then the chief
eunuch went out before him and the little white slaves behind him, and
they ceased not [going] till they raised the curtain and brought him into
the hall of judgment and the throne-room of the Khalifate. There he
saw the curtains and the forty doors and El Ijli and Er Recashi[FN#25]
and Ibdan and Jedim and Abou Ishac [FN#26] the boon-companions
and beheld swords drawn and lions [FN#27] encompassing [the throne]
and gilded glaives and death-dealing bows and Persians and Arabs and
Turks and Medes and folk and peoples and Amirs and viziers and
captains and grandees and officers of state and men of war, and indeed
there appeared the puissance of the house of Abbas [FN#28] and the
majesty of the family of the Prophet.
So he sat down upon the throne of the Khalifate and laid the dagger in
his lap, whereupon all [present] came up to kiss the earth before him
and called down on him length of life and continuance [of glory and
prosperity]. Then came forward Jaafer the Barmecide and kissing the
earth, said, "May the wide world of God be the treading of thy feet and
may Paradise be thy dwelling-place and the fire the habitation of thine
enemies! May no neighbour transgress against thee nor the lights of fire
die out for thee, [FN#29] O Khalif of [all] cities and ruler of [all]
countries!"
Therewithal Aboulhusn cried out at him and said, "O dog of the sons of
Bermek, go down forthright, thou and the master of the police of the
city, to such a place in such a street and deliver a hundred dinars to the
mother of Aboulhusn the Wag and bear her my salutation. [Then, go to
such a mosque] and take the four sheikhs and the Imam and beat each
of them with four hundred lashes and
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