Susan Clegg and a Man in the House | Page 9

Dr. Brown says the
editor belongs on the inside, anyhow. Dr. Brown's most awful mad
'cause Elijah's put his item right in with the advertisement of Lydia
Finkham, an' he says he ain't nothin' as pretends to cure anythin' or
everybody. He says he's a regular doctor as you have to take regular
chances with an' he feels like suin' Elijah for slander. Gran'ma Mullins
is mad, too, 'cause she was put in the personals an' Elijah went an'
called her the 'Nestor of the crick,' without never so much as askin' by
her leave. She says she ain't never done nothin' with the crick, an' if she
ever nested anywhere it was in her own owned an' mortgaged house.
Hiram says he'll punch Elijah if he ever refers to his mother's nestin'
again, an' I guess Hiram feels kind of sore over Elijah's talkin' of his
mother's nestin' when all the town knows how much he wishes as
Lucy'd settle down and nest awhile instead of keepin' 'em all so
everlastin'ly churned up. Mrs. Macy told me this mornin' as Lucy's
whitewashin' the garret this week; she see the brush goin' 'round an'
'round the window on her side--she says it makes her bones ache just to
live next door to Lucy's ways. She says they're so different from
Gran'ma Mullins' ways. Gran'ma Mullins had n't had no whitewashin'
done in twenty years--not since she rented the cottage of father. That's
true an' I know it's true too because she's been askin' an' askin' me to
have it done an' I said not by no means--so she's left off."
"Did--?" asked Mrs. Lathrop.
"The Jilkinses is real mad over the paper, too," Susan continued.
"Seems as Elijah went an' called 'em the 'Chirpy Cherry Ponders,' an'
Mrs. Jilkins says where he got the idea as either of 'em ever chirped in
their lives she cannot conceive, for Mr. Jilkins ain't so much as peeped
a good part of the time since they were married an' she says as for
being chirpy, she looks upon the word as city slang. But Judge Fitch is
about the maddest of all! I did n't read what Elijah said about him but
every one else did, an' he says he was willin' to run for congress for the

good of his country, but to put him up in a editorial as says he'll be
proud to come back from Washington as poor as he goes there, is a
very poor way to put heart into any man's contest. He says if he's got to
come back from Washington as poor as he goes he can't see no good an'
sufficient reason for goin' a tall, for he won't gain nothin' an' will be out
his car fare there an' back. He says he never heard of no one comin'
back from Washington as poor as they went before, an' it was a thing as
he supposed could n't be done till he found Elijah had booked him to do
it. He says if that's what he's to up an' teach his country, he don't thank
Elijah for advertisin' him as any such novelty an' he says he won't go to
congress on any such terms--not while he knows himself. Mr. Kimball
told me as he spoke to Elijah about it yesterday, an' Elijah said to him
as it would be a strong plank for Judge Fitch to stand on in the middle
of his platform, but Judge Fitch told Mr. Kimball as he could just tell
his nephew frank an' open as that one plank in his platform had better
be weak an' he'd take care to remember to step over it every time. He
said he was just waitin' for a good chance to tell Elijah his opinion of
him right to his face, an' he said as he should give him to understand as
after this he must submit all other planks to him afore he printed 'em.
Mr. Kimball says that Judge Fitch said good gracious him, there would
n't be no knowin' what he'd have to live up to next, if Elijah was n't
reined in tighter. Judge Fitch says the old way is good enough for him
when he goes to Washington.
"But that ain't all the trouble there is. Mr. Fisher feels very much hurt at
Elijah's writin' any editorial without consultin' him first. He says he told
him as he could have give him a motto out of Shakespeare about layin'
on an' dammin' as would have put life in the campaign right off at the
beginnin'; an' then there's Mrs. Macy as thinks he was awful mean to
call her one as carries weight anywhere; I'm sure I wish Elijah had let
Mrs. Macy alone for