Sun-Up and Other Poems | Page 4

of the bank?have on white stockings too.
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Celia says my father?will bring me a golden bowl.?When I think of my father?I cannot see him?for the big yellow bowl?like the moon with two handles?he carries in front of him.
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Grandpa, grandpa...?(Light all about you...?ginger... pouring out of green jars...)?You don't believe he has gone away and left his great coat... so you pretend... you see his face up in the ceiling.?When you clap your hands and cry, grandpa, grandpa, grandpa, Celia crosses herself.
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It isn't a dream....?It comes again and again....?You hear ivy crying on steeples?the flames haven't caught yet?and images screaming?when they see red light on the lilies?on the stained glass window of St. Joseph.?The girl with the black eyes holds you tight,?and you run... and run?past the wild, wild towers...?and trees in the gardens tugging at their feet?and little frightened dolls?shut up in the shops?crying... and crying... because no one stops...?you spin like a penny thrown out in the street.?Then the man clutches her by the hair....?He always clutches her by the hair....?His eyes stick out like spears.?You see her pulled-back face?and her black, black eyes?lit up by the glare....?Then everything goes out.?Please God, don't let me dream any more?of the girl with the black, black eyes.
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Celia's shadow rocks and rocks...?and mama's eyes stare out of the pillow?as though she had gone away?and the night had come in her place?as it comes in empty rooms...?you can't bear it--?the night threshing about?and lashing its tail on its sides?as bold as a wolf that isn't afraid--?and you scream at her face, that is white as a stone on a grave and pull it around to the light,?till the night draws backward... the night that walks alone and goes away without end.?Mama says, I am cold, Betty, and shivers.?Celia tucks the quilt about her feet,?but I run for my little red cloak?because red is hot like fire.
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I wish Celia?could see the sea climb up on the sky?and slide off again...?...Celia saying?I'd beg the world with you....?Celia... holding on to the cab...?hands wrenched away...?wind in the masts... like Celia crying....?Celia never minded if you slapped her?when the comb made your hairs ache,?but though you rub your cheek against mama's hand?she has not said darling since....?Now I will slap her again....?I will bite her hand till it bleeds.
It is cool by the port hole.?The wet rags of the wind?flap in your face.
II
THE ALLEY
Because you are four years old?the candle is all dressed up in a new frill.?And stars nod to you through the hole in the curtain,?(except the big stiff planets?too fat to move about much,)?and you curtsey back to the stars?when no one is looking.?You feel sorry for the poor wooden chair?that knows it isn't nice to sit on,?and no one is sad but mama.?You don't like mama to be sad?when you are four years old,?so you pretend?you like the bitter gold-pale tea--?you pretend?if you don't drink it up pretty quick?a little gold-fish?will think it is a pond?and come and get born in it.
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It's hot in our street?and the breeze is a dirty little broom?that sweeps dust into our room?and bits of paper out of the alley.?You are not let to play?with the children in the alley?But you must be very polite--?so you pass them and say good day?and when they fling banana skins?you fling them back again.
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There is no one to play with?and the flies on the window?buzz and buzz...?...you can pull out their legs?and stick pins in their bodies?but still they buzz...?and mama says:?When Nero was a little boy?he caught flies on his mama's window?and pulled out their legs?and stuck pins in their bodies?and nobody loved him.?Buzz, blue-bellied flies--?buzz, nasty black wheel?of mama's machine--?you are the biggest fly of all--?you have the loudest buzz.?I hear you at dawn before the locusts.?But I like the picture of the Flood?and the little babies getting drowned....?If I were there I would save them,?but as I can't save them?I like to watch them?getting drowned.
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When mama buys of Ling Ho,?he smiles very wide?and picks her the largest loquots.?The greens-man gave her a cabbage?and she held it against her black bodice?and said what a beautiful green it was?and put it on the table?as though it had been a flower.?But next day we boiled and ate it with salt.?It was our dinner.
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Christmas day?I found Janie on my pillow.?Janie is made of rubber.?Her red and blue jacket won't come off.?Christmas dinner was green and white?chicken and lettuce and peas?and drops of oil on the salad?smiley and full of light?like the gold on the lady's teeth.
But mama said politely?Thank you, we are dining out.?She wouldn't let you take one pea?to put in the hole where the whistle was?at the back of Janie's head,?so Janie should have some dinner?So you went to the park with