Songs Of The Road | Page 6

fare,?And to his couch she bore him
The raiment he should wear.
To mine he had been welcome,
My suit of russet brown,?But she had dressed our weary guest
In a loose and easy gown.
And long in peace he lay there,
Brooding and still and weak,?Smiling from day to day there
At thoughts he would not speak.
The months flowed on, but ever
Our guest would still remain,?Nor made the least endeavour
To leave our home again.
He heeded not for grammar,
Nor did we care to teach,?But soon he learned to stammer
Some words of English speech.
With these our guest would tell us
The things that he liked best,?And order and compel us
To follow his behest.
He ruled us without malice,
But as if he owned us all,?A sultan in his palace
With his servants at his call.
Those calls came fast and faster,
Our service still we gave,?Till I who had been master
Had grown to be his slave.
He claimed with grasping gestures
Each thing of price he saw,?Watches and rings and vestures,
His will the only law.
In vain had I commanded,
In vain I struggled still,?Servants and wife were banded
To do the stranger's will.
And then in deep dejection
It came to me one day,?That my own wife's affection
Had been beguiled away.
Our love had known no danger,
So certain had it been!?And now to think a stranger
Should dare to step between.
I saw him lie and harken
To the little songs she sung,?And when the shadows darken
I could hear his lisping tongue.
They would sit in chambers shady,
When the light was growing dim,?Ah, my fickle-hearted lady!
With your arm embracing him.
So, at last, lest he divide us,
I would put them to the test.?There was no one there beside us,
Save this interloping guest.
So I took my stand before them,
Very silent and erect,?My accusing glance passed o'er them,
Though with no observed effect.
But the lamp light shone upon her,
And I saw each tell-tale feature,?As I cried, "Now, on your honour,
Do or don't you love the creature?"
But her answer seemed evasive,
It was "Ducky-doodle-doo!?If his mummy loves um babby,
Doesn't daddums love um too?"
BENDY'S SERMON
[Bendigo, the well-known Nottingham prize fighter, became converted to religion, and preached at revival meetings throughout the country.]
You didn't know of Bendigo! Well, that
knocks me out!?Who's your board school teacher? What's
he been about?
Chock-a-block with fairy-tales -- full of
useless cram,?And never heard o' Bendigo, the pride of
Nottingham!
Bendy's short for Bendigo. You should
see him peel!?Half of him was whalebone, half of him
was steel,
Fightin' weight eleven ten, five foot nine
in height,?Always ready to oblige if you want a
fight.
I could talk of Bendigo from here to kingdom
come,?I guess before I ended you would wish your
dad was dumb.
I'd tell you how he fought Ben Caunt, and
how the deaf 'un fell,?But the game is done, and the men are
gone -- and maybe it's as well.
Bendy he turned Methodist--he said he
felt a call,?He stumped the country preachin' and you
bet he filled the hall,
If you seed him in the pulpit, a-bleatin'
like a lamb,?You'd never know bold Bendigo, the
pride of Nottingham.
His hat was like a funeral, he'd got a
waiter's coat,?With a hallelujah collar and a choker round
his throat,
His pals would laugh and say in chaff that
Bendigo was right,?In takin' on the devil, since he'd no one
else to fight.
But he was very earnest, improvin' day by
day,?A-workin' and a-preachin' just as his duty
lay,
But the devil he was waitin', and in the
final bout,?He hit him hard below his guard and
knocked poor Bendy out.
Now I'll tell you how it happened. He
was preachin' down at Brum,?He was billed just like a circus, you should
see the people come,
The chapel it was crowded, and in the foremost
row,?There was half a dozen bruisers who'd a
grudge at Bendigo.
There was Tommy Piatt of Bradford,
Solly Jones of Perry Bar,?Long Connor from the Bull Ring, the
same wot drew with Carr,
Jack Ball the fightin gunsmith, Joe Murphy
from the Mews,?And Iky Moss, the bettin' boss, the
Champion of the Jews.
A very pretty handful a-sittin' in a
string,?Full of beer and impudence, ripe for anything,
Sittin' in a string there, right under
Bendy's nose,?If his message was for sinners, he could
make a start on those.
Soon he heard them chaflin'; "Hi, Bendy!
Here's a go!"?"How much are you coppin' by this Jump
to Glory show?"
"Stow it, Bendy! Left the ring! Mighty
spry of you!?Didn't everybody know the ring was
leavin' you."
Bendy fairly sweated as he stood above
and prayed,?"Look down, O Lord, and grip me with
a strangle hold!" he said.
"Fix me with a strangle hold! Put a stop
on me!?I'm slippin', Lord, I'm slippin' and I'm
clingin' hard to Thee!"
But the roughs they kept on chaffin' and
the uproar it was such?That the preacher in the pulpit might be
talkin' double Dutch,
Till a workin' man he shouted out, ajumpin'
to his feet,?"Give us a lead, your reverence, and heave
'em in the street."
Then Bendy said, "Good Lord, since
first I left my sinful ways,?Thou knowest that to Thee alone I've
given up my days,
But now, dear Lord"--and here he laid his
Bible on the shelf--?"I'll take, with your permission, just five
minutes for myself."
He vaulted from the pulpit like a tiger
from a