Short Stories, vol 11 | Page 9

your ear? A lump of wax?"
"I don't know whether it's wax; but I know that it is a bug, a big bug,
that crawled in while I was asleep in the haystack."
"A bug! Are you sure?"
"Am I sure? As sure as I am of heaven, Monsieur le cure! I can feel it
gnawing at the bottom of my ear! It's eating my head for sure! It's
eating my head! Oh-oh-oh!" And he began to stamp his foot again.
Great interest had been aroused among the spectators. Each one gave
his bit of advice. Poiret claimed that it was a spider, the teacher,
thought it might be a caterpillar. He had already seen such a thing once,
at Campemuret, in Orne, where he had been for six years. In this case
the caterpillar had gone through the head and out at the nose. But the
man remained deaf in that ear ever after, the drum having been pierced.
"It's more likely to be a worm," said the priest.
Maitre Belhomme, his head resting against the door, for he had been
the last one to enter, was still moaning.
"Oh--oh--oh! I think it must be an ant, a big ant--there it is biting again.
Oh, Monsieur le cure, how it hurts! how it hurts!"

"Have you seen the doctor?" asked Caniveau.
"I should say not!"
"Why?"
The fear of the doctor seemed to cure Belhomme. He straightened up
without, however, dropping his handkerchief.
"What! You have money for them, for those loafers? He would have
come once, twice, three times, four times, five times! That means two
five- franc pieces, two five-franc pieces, for sure. And what would he
have done, the loafer, tell me, what would he have done? Can you tell
me?"
Caniveau was laughing.
"No, I don't know. Where are you going?"
"I am going to Havre, to see Chambrelan."
"Who is Chambrelan?"
"The healer, of course."
"What healer?"
"The healer who cured my father."
"Your father?"
"Yes, the healer who cured my father years ago."
"What was the matter with your father?"
"A draught caught him in the back, so that he couldn't move hand or
foot."
"Well, what did your friend Chambrelan do to him?"
"He kneaded his back with both hands as though he were making bread!
And he was all right in a couple of hours!"
Belhomme thought that Chambrelan must also have used some charm,
but he did not dare say so before the priest. Caniveau replied, laughing:
"Are you sure it isn't a rabbit that you have in your ear? He might have
taken that hole for his home. Wait, I'll make him run away."
Whereupon Caniveau, making a megaphone of his hands, began to
mimic the barking of hounds. He snapped, howled, growled, barked.
And everybody in the carriage began to roar, even the schoolmaster,
who, as a rule, never ever smiled.
However, as Belhomme seemed angry at their making fun of him, the
priest changed the conversation and turning to Rabot's big wife, said:
"You have a large family, haven't you?"
"Oh, yes, Monsieur le cure--and it's a pretty hard matter to bring them

up!"
Rabot agreed, nodding his head as though to say: "Oh, yes, it's a hard
thing to bring up!"
"How many children?"
She replied authoritatively in a strong, clear voice:
"Sixteen children, Monsieur le cure, fifteen of them by my husband!"
And Rabot smiled broadly, nodding his head. He was responsible for
fifteen, he alone, Rabot! His wife said so! Therefore there could be no
doubt about it. And he was proud!
And whose was the sixteenth? She didn't tell. It was doubtless the first.
Perhaps everybody knew, for no one was surprised. Even Caniveau
kept mum.
But Belhomme began to moan again:
"Oh-oh-oh! It's scratching about in the bottom of my ear! Oh, dear, oh,
dear!"
The coach just then stopped at the Cafe Polyto. The priest said:
"If someone were to pour a little water into your ear, it might perhaps
drive it out. Do you want to try?"
"Sure! I am willing."
And everybody got out in order to witness the operation. The priest
asked for a bowl, a napkin and a glass of water, then he told the teacher
to hold the patient's head over on one side, and, as soon as the liquid
should have entered the ear, to turn his head over suddenly on the other
side.
But Caniveau, who was already peering into Belhomme's ear to see if
he couldn't discover the beast, shouted:
"Gosh! What a mess! You'll have to clear that out, old man. Your rabbit
could never get through that; his feet would stick."
The priest in turn examined the passage and saw that it was too narrow
and too congested for him to attempt to