Real Life In London, Volumes I and II | Page 3

Police Office scene, 341.
Bartholomew Fair, 342. A Knight of the Needle, 343. Variance of
opinion, 344. A visit to the Poet, 345. Produce of literary pursuits, 346.
Quantum versus Quality, 347. Publishing by subscription, 348. Wealth
and ignorance, 349. Mutual gratification, 350.
Chapter XXII.
Symptoms of alarm, 351. Parties missing, 352. A strange world, 353.
Wanted, and must come, 354. Expectation alive, 355. A cure for
melancholy, 356. Real Life a game, 357. The game over, 358.
Money-dropping arts, 359. Dividing a prize, 360. The Holy Alliance
broke up, 361. New method of Hat catching, 362. Dispatching a
customer, 363. Laconic colloquy, 364. Barkers, 365. A mistake
corrected, 366. Pawnbrokers, 367. The biter bit, 368. Miseries of
prostitution, 369. Wardrobe accommodations, 370. New species of
depredation, 371.
Chapter XXIII.
The Lock-up House, 372. Real Life with John Doe, etc., 373. Every
thing done by proxy, 374. Lottery of marriage, 375. Sharp-shooting and
skirmishing, 376. A fancy sketch, 377. The universal talisman, 378.
Living within bounds, 379. How to live for ten years, 380. An
accommodating host, 381. Life in a lock-up house, 382.
Chapter XXIV.
A successful election, 383. Patriotic intentions, 384. Political dinner,

385. Another bear-garden, 386. Charley's theatre, 387. Bear-baiting
sports, 388. The coronation, 389. Coronation splendour, 390.
Chapter XXV.
Fancy sports, 392. Road to a fight, 393. New sentimental journey, 394.
Travelling chaff, 395. Humours of the road, 396. Lads of the fancy, 397.
Centre of attraction, 398. A force march, 399. Getting to work, 400.
True game, 401. The sublime and beautiful, 402. All's well-good night,
403.
Chapter XXVI.
Promenading reflections, 404. Anticipation, 405. Preliminary
observations, 406. Characters in masquerade, 407. Irish sympathy, 408.
Whimsicalities of character, 409. Masquerade characters, 410. The
watchman, 411. New characters, 412. The sport alive, 413. Multifarious
amusements, 414. Doctors disagree, 415. Israelitish honesty, 416.
Chapter XXVII.
Ideal enjoyments, 417. A glance at new objects, 418. Street- walking
nuisances, 419. Cries of London-Mud-larks, etc., 420. The Monument,
421. London Stone, 422. General Post- Office, 423. Preparations for
returning, 424. So endeth the volume, 425.

LIST OF THE PLATES
The Principal Characters presented to Public Exhibition throughout
Real Life in London Frontispiece.
Illustrated Title Page.
Hyde Park 16
Epsom Races 44

Fives Court 71
LEVEE, Carlton House 79
Tom and Bob catching a Charley napping 92
Theatre 130
Lobby at Drury Lane 138
Tattersall's 160
Modern Hell 196
Exhibition, Somerset House 240
Road to a Fight (Plate 1.) 286
Billingsgate 298
Political Dinner 385
Charley's Theatre 387
Coronation 390
Road to a Fight (Plate 2.) 398
Private Turn-up 402
Masquerade 410

REAL LIFE IN LONDON
CHAPTER I
Triumphant returning at night with the spoil, Like Bachanals, shouting
and gay: How sweet with a bottle and song to refresh, And lose the

fatigues of the day. With sport, wit, and wine, fickle fortune defy, Dull
'wisdom all happiness sours; Since Life is no more than a passage at
best, Let's strew the way over with flowers.
~1~~"THEY order these things better in London," replied the Hon.
Tom Dashall, to an old weather-beaten sportsman, who would fain
have made a convert of our London Sprig of Fashion to the sports and
delights of rural life. The party were regaling themselves after the
dangers and fatigues of a very hard day's fox-chace; and, while the
sparkling glass circulated, each, anxious to impress on the minds of the
company the value of the exploits and amusements in which he felt
most delight, became more animated and boisterous in his
oratory--forgetting that excellent regulation which forms an article in
some of the rules and orders of our "Free and Easies" in London, "that
no more than three gentlemen shall be allowed to speak at the same
time." The whole party, consisting of fourteen, like a pack in full cry,
had, with the kind assistance of the "rosy god," become at the same
moment most animated, not to say vociferous, orators. The young
squire, Bob Tally ho, (as he was called) of Belville Hall, who had
recently come into possession of this fine and extensive domain, was
far from feeling indifferent to the pleasures of a sporting life, and, in
the chace, had even acquired the reputation of being a "keen
sportsman:" but the regular intercourse which took place between him
and his cousin, the Hon. Tom Dashall, of Bond Street notoriety, had in
~2~~some measure led to an indecision of character, and often when
perusing the lively and fascinating descriptions which the latter drew of
the passing scenes in the gay metropolis, Bob would break out into an
involuntary exclamation of--"Curse me, but after all, this only is Real
Life; "--while, for the moment, horses, dogs, and gun, with the whole
paraphernalia of sporting, were annihilated. Indeed, to do justice to his
elegant and highly-finished friend, these