Quit Your Worrying! | Page 5

and never try to practice. Lawyers and judges are all dishonest

swindlers caring nothing for honor and justice and seeking only their
fees; physicians and surgeons are pitiless wretches who scare their
patients in order to extort money from them; men in office are waiting,
lurking, hunting for chances to graft, eager to steal from their
constituents at every opportunity. He expects every thing, every animal,
every man, every woman to get the best of him--and, as a rule, he is not
disappointed. For we can nearly always be accommodated in life and
get that for which we look.
We are told that all these imaginary ills come from physical causes.
The hypochondrium is supposed to be affected, and as it is located
under the "short ribs," the hypochondriac continuously suffers from
that awful "sinking at the pit of the stomach" that makes him feel as if
the bottom had dropped out of life itself. He can neither eat, digest his
food, walk, sit, rest, work, take pleasure, exercise, or sleep. His body is
the victim of innumerable ills. His tongue, his lips, his mouth are dry
and parched, his throat full of slime and phlegm, his stomach painful,
his bowels full of gas, and he regards himself as cursed of God--a
walking receptacle of woe. To physician, wife, husband, children,
employer, employee, pastor, and friend alike the hypochondriac is a
pest, a nuisance, a chill and almost a curse, and, poor creature, these
facts do not take away or lessen our sympathy for him, for, though
most of his ills are imaginary, he suffers more than do those who come
in contact with him.
Then there is the neurasthenic--the mentally collapsed whose collapse
invariably comes from too great tension or worry. I know several
housewives who became neurasthenic by too great anxiety to keep their
houses spotless. Not a speck of dust must be anywhere. The slightest
appearance of inattention or carelessness in this matter was a great
source of worry, and they worried lest the maid fail to do her duty.
I know another housewife who is so dainty and refined that, though her
husband's income is strained almost to the breaking point, she must
have everything in the house so dainty and fragile that no ordinary
servant can be trusted to care for the furniture, wash the dishes, polish
the floors, etc., and the result is she is almost a confirmed neurasthenic

because, in the first place, she worries over her dainty things, and,
secondly, exhausts herself in caring for these unnecessarily fragile
household equipments.
Every neurasthenic is a confirmed worrier. He ever sits on the "stool of
repentance," clothing himself in sackcloth and ashes for what he has
done or not done. He cries aloud--by his acts--every five minutes or so:
"We have done those things which we ought not to have done and have
left undone those things which we ought to have done, and there is no
health in us." Everything past is regretted, everything present is in
doubt, and nothing but anxieties and uncertainties meet the future. If he
holds a position of responsibility he asks his subordinates or associates
to perform certain services and then "worries himself to death,"
watching to see that they "do it right," or afraid lest they forget to do it
at all. He wakes up from a sound sleep in dread lest he forgot to lock
the door, turn out the electric light in the hall, or put out the gas. He
becomes the victim of uncertainty and indecision. He fears lest he
decide wrongly, he worries that he hasn't yet decided, and yet having
thoroughly argued a matter out and come to a reasonable conclusion,
allows his worries to unsettle him and is forever questioning his
decision and going back to revise and rerevise it. Whatever he does or
doesn't do he regrets and wishes he had done the converse.
Husbands are worried about their wives; wives about their husbands;
parents about their children; children about their parents. Farmers are
worried over their crops; speculators over their gamblings; investors
over their investments. Teachers are worried over their pupils, and
pupils over their lessons, their grades, and their promotions. Statesmen
(!) are worried over their constituents, and the latter are generally
worried by their representatives. People who have schemes to
further--legitimate or otherwise--are worried when they are retarded,
and competitors are worried if they are not. Pastors are worried over
their congregations,--occasionally about their salaries, very often about
their large families, and now and again about their fitness for their holy
office,--and there are few congregations that, at one time or another, are
not worried by, as well as about, their pastors. The miner is worried
when he sees his ledge "petering out," or finds the ore failing to