Punch, or the London Charivari,
Vol. 152, May 2, 1917
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May 2, 1917, by Various This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere
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Title: Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 152, May 2, 1917
Author: Various
Release Date: February 21, 2005 [EBook #15121]
Language: English
Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
VOL. 152.
May 2nd, 1917.
CHARIVARIA.
WE envy the freshness of America's experience as a member of the
Alliance. New York will hold its first flag day on June 2nd.
***
America is anxious to see a settlement of the Irish Question, but there is
no truth in the rumour that we have cabled to say that we will take on
Mexico if America will take on Ireland.
***
VON IHNE, the KAISER'S Court architect, is dead. It is thought that
future alterations to the House of Hohenzollern will not reflect, as
heretofore, the ALL-HIGHEST'S personal taste.
***
"Stern measures for King Tino," says a contemporary. We have always
felt that that is where the castigation should take place.
***
The Daily Chronicle reminds us that Downing Street owes its origin to
an American. There are some people who never will let bygones be
bygones.
***
Whole haystacks are said to have been eaten in a night by mice in
Victoria, Australia. The failure of Mr. HUGHES to provide a state cat
in each rural area may, it is thought, prove to be the deciding factor in
the present election campaign.
***
The Tageblatt points out that in view of the extreme goodwill of
Germany towards Spain that country cannot possibly find any
grievance in the torpedoing of her ships. This assurance of
uninterrupted friendliness has confirmed the worst fears of the
pessimists in Madrid.
***
Mr. BALFOUR, it is stated, has invited President WILSON to play a
game of golf. In the event of a match being arranged there is a growing
desire that the occasion should be made a half-holiday throughout the
war-area.
***
The Ministry of Shipping, it is stated, employs only 830 persons. This
violent departure from the recognised Parliamentary rule, that a
Minister who cannot find use for a couple of thousand employees
should resign, has gone far to undermine the popularity of this
Department.
***
Owing to the shortage of corn on which race-horses must be fed,
ordinary handicaps will soon have to be abandoned. The idea of putting
the horseradish to the use for which it was originally intended does not
seem to have struck the imagination of trainers.
***
The Director of Women's Service has issued an appeal for several
thousand milkmaids. These must not be confused with milksops who
are being taken care of by other Departments.
***
"I have heard more bad music at temperance meetings," says Dr.
SALEEBY, "than I knew the world could contain." The temperance
people are certainly having persistent bad luck.
***
The keenest minds in Germany, says a Berlin correspondent, are now
seeking to discover the secret of the Fatherland's world-wide
unpopularity. It is this absurd sensitiveness on the part of our cultured
opponent that is causing some of her best friends in this country to lose
hope.
***
A swallow has been seen over the Hollow Ponds at Epping Forest, but
The Daily Mail is still silent as to whether Spring has arrived or not.
***
"New Laid Eggs," Sir JOHN MILLAIS' masterpiece, has recently been
sold for £1,155. It is reported that last December, when it looked as if
the egg might become extinct, a much higher price was offered for the
picture.
***
In the absence of other grain, hens are to be fed upon frostbitten wheat
imported from Canada. Poultry-keepers anticipate that it will result in a
greatly increased number of china eggs being laid by their stock.
***
A correspondent of a morning paper complains that while the entire
nation is on rations our Germans, naturalised and unnaturalised,
"continue to eat in the usual way." This is not true of the ones we have
heard.
***
In view of the excessive rains of late, we are glad to note that one
organisation is not to be caught napping. The National Lifeboat
Institution is fitting out its boats with a new life-belt.
***
The KAISER, it is reported, has written a play. It only needed this to
convince us that he is quite himself again.
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