Punch, or the London Charivari | Page 9

brilliant galaxy of guests drawn together in same place since Mr. PHELPS, the American Minister, said farewell in memorable speech. Much struck with completeness of arrangements. Even the waiters imbued with consciousness of great occasion.
"Hope you enjide your dinner, Sir?" said one to me, when dessert placed on table.
"Excellent," I said; "perhaps the whitebait done a little too much; showed tendency to present itself in fragments; but 'twas nothing."
"Yessir," said the Waiter, diligently brushing off imaginary crumbs. "I'm going now, Sir."
"Ah," I said; "then I suppose you don't wait to hear the speeches; flow of reason, you know, quite a treat."
"Yessir," said he, still pegging away at the spotless table-cloth. "Can I get you anything more, Sir?"
"No, thank you," I said, quite touched at the man's considerate attention, the more marked since, as far as I recognised him, I had not seen him before. "I've done excellently."
"Yessir. I'm going now." Hardly seemed able to part. Not sure whether, in circumstances of international amity, I shouldn't have shaken hands with him. Made half advance in that direction. He quickly advanced his hand, but after glance at my extended palm, as rapidly withdrew it. Perhaps he was right. Not usual to shake hands with Waiter, though really, on occasion like this, one might disregard conventionalities. Waiter lingeringly withdrew, still keeping his eye on me, as if expecting me to call him back. Nodded a friendly farewell, and pensively peeled an orange, thinking how one touch of nature makes us kin. This good Waiter and I quite subdued by the graceful, generous thought of Lord Mayor KNILL, who has added one more link to the chain that binds in amity two nations that have fought all the way from Cressy to Waterloo.
Business done.--Got into Committee on Navy Estimates. In the Lobby sort of rehearsal of new Battle of Boyne. The other night SAUNDERSON said something disrespectful of Irish Members. WILLIE REDMOND, from his proud position among nobility and gentry above Gangway, called out, "You wouldn't say that in the Lobby." "Say it anywhere," responded the Colonel, ever ready to oblige.
Next day wrote letter to REDMOND, incidentally mentioning that if he wanted to hear the words over again, should meet him in Lobby to-night after questions. Nothing nearer REDMOND'S heart's desire. At five o'clock Colonel, accompanied by another military gentleman, carrying his cloak, a pair of pistols, a stiletto, a bottle of eau de Cologne, a sponge, and a clothes-brush, sternly strode into Lobby. Carefully counted paces till he was standing as nearly as possible on centre tile; folded arms, and wished that Night or REDMOND would come. Colonel WARING, with military accoutrements and cloak; stood a pace and a half to the left rear. Presently entered REDMOND, accompanied by J. J. O'KELLY, also carrying cloak. Secreted in folds were shillelagh, bottle of whiskey, pair of spurs, a toothpick, and a freshly-minted crown-piece. This last, at suitable moment, to be flung across Lobby; (friend secretly told off to be on alert to pick it up.) Action to be explained as typical of throwing King's Crown into the Boyne. The principals approaching, REDMOND, after manner of schoolboys, who edge up to each other, each hoping the other doesn't want to fight, asked Colonel to "say it again." "Certainly; but say what?" Here difficulty began, which spoiled whole business. REDMOND insisted upon being called a murderer. SAUNDERSON punctilious on minor points, wouldn't go quite so far in his desire to oblige. Angry altercation followed; Members, to number of something like hundred, formed ring. REDMOND, with right shoulder aggressively hoisted, spoke over it at the Colonel. Colonel stood erect, with hands loosely hanging by his side, ready for emergencies. Crowd grew thicker and more excited. "Expected every moment would be our next," as CLANCY breathlessly put it. But in the end storm blew itself out. Nothing happened, and crowd disappointedly dispersed.
Ulster will fight, But----not to-night.
Thursday.--Opposition mustered to-day in high spirits; meeting at Carlton yesterday addressed by MARKISS and Prince ARTHUR; GRANDOLPH, looking in, took back seat in his customary retiring fashion. Meeting insisted on his coming to the front; made spirited speech; scarcely a dry eye in the Club when, looking shyly across at Prince ARTHUR, he alluded to him as his "old political friend," his "brilliant and esteemed Parliamentary Leader."
"I think," said the MARKISS, as meeting dispersed, "this will drive nail in coffin of Home-Rule Bill, and make things pretty hot for Mr. G. As HART DYKE epigrammatically puts it, 'We Unionists, above all others, should be united.'"
This, as I mentioned, happened yesterday. This afternoon Opposition mustered in anticipation of aggressive action by Mr. G. Had given notice to move suspension of Twelve o'Clock Rule, in order to make progress with Estimates.
"Not if we know it," said Right Hon. JAMES LOWTHER, commonly called "JEMMIE."
Mr. G., previous