Punch, or the London Charivari | Page 9

but the rest of the House seemed a little
chilly, and Mr. CHURCHILL, at the PRIME MINISTER'S elbow,
looked about as happy as NAPOLEON on the return from Moscow.
[Illustration: HILARITY OF MR. CHURCHILL ON HEARING HIS
CHIEF'S VIEWS ABOUT RUSSIA.]

Lord HUGH CECIL raised the standard of economy, and complained
that the legislative programme was extravagantly long. "A large
number of Bills generally meant a large amount of expenditure." I have
myself observed this phenomenon.
_Wednesday, February 11th._--The Lords, having disposed of the
Address with their usual celerity, welcomed Baron RIDDELL of
Walton Heath (and, perhaps I may add, Bouverie Street) to their ranks,
and then adjourned for a week.
If all Labour Members possessed the sweet reasonableness of Mr.
BRACE we should view the advent of a Labour Government without
any of Mr. CHURCHILL'S misgivings. The Member for Abertillery
argued the case for the nationalisation of mines so gently and genially
that before he sat down I am sure that a good half of his hearers began
to think that, after all, there was "something in it." Visions of a
carboniferous millennium, when there would be no more strikes and
hardly any accidents, and altruistic colliers would hew their hardest to
get cheap and abundant coal for the community, floated before the
mind's eye as Mr. BRACE purred persuasively along.
[Illustration: THE PIED PIPER OF ABERTILLERY
(MR. W. BRACE).
"FOR HE LED US, HE SAID, TO A JOYOUS LAND
WHERE WATERS GUSHED AND FRUIT-TREES GREW,
AND FLOWERS PUT FORTH A FAIRER HUE,
AND EVERYTHING WAS STRANGE AND NEW."]
Unfortunately for the Nationalisers Mr. LUNN thought it necessary
later to make a blood-and-thunder oration, threatening all sorts of
dreadful things (including a boycott of the newspapers) if the Miners'
demands were refused. Moreover, he made it clear that coal was only a
beginning and that the Labour Party's ultimate objective was

nationalisation all round, and wound up by reminding the House that
"we are many and ye are few."
The PRIME MINISTER is not the man either to miss a chance or
refuse a challenge. The tone of his reply was set by Mr. LUNN, not by
Mr. BRACE; and though he had plenty of solid arguments to advance
against the motion the most telling passage in his speech was a
quotation from "Comrade TROTSKY," showing what Nationalisation
had spelt in Soviet Russia--labour conscription in its most drastic shape.
The nation, he declared, that had fought for liberty throughout the
world would stand to the death against this new bondage.
Result: Amendment defeated by 329 to 64.
_Thursday, February 12th._--This was the first Question-day of the
new Session, and the House was flattered to see Mr. LLOYD GEORGE
in his place, despite the counter-claims of the Peace Conference at St.
James's Palace. Evidently he means this year to "stick to the shop"
more closely, in view, perhaps, of the possible return from Paisley of
the old proprietor.
To a Labour Member's complaint that several ex-Generals had been
appointed as divisional Food officers, Mr. MCCURDY replied that no
preference was given to military candidates. But why not? Where will
you find more competent judges of alimentary questions than in the
higher ranks of His Majesty's Forces?
In attacking the provisions of the Peace Treaty with Germany as
"impracticable," Sir DONALD MACLEAN revealed himself as a
diligent student of a recent notorious book. Most of his
observations--excepting, perhaps, the statement that he had "no
sentimental tenderness for the Germans"--were marked with the brand
of KEYNES, and his assertion that the utmost Germany could pay was
two thousand millions came bodily from that eminent statistician. To
the same inspiration was possibly due the unhappy suggestion that our
chief Ally was pursuing a policy of revenge.
For this he was promptly pulled up by Lord ROBERT CECIL, who

warned him not to judge the policy of France by the utterances of
certain French newspapers. Lord ROBERT had, however, his own
quarrel with the Government, who, according to his account, had done
nothing to set Central Europe on its legs again, except to send it a
certain amount of food--not, one would would have thought, an
altogether bad preliminary.
It was a pity that Mr. BALFOUR had not a stronger indictment to
answer, for he was dialectically at his best. After complimenting the
Opposition leader on his "charming tones and anodyne temper" he
proceeded to take up his challenge--"if I may call it a challenge." If
Germany was in doubt as to the amount she might be called upon to
pay, she had her remedy, for the Peace Treaty especially provided that
she might offer a "lump sum." The list of war-criminals was long, no
doubt, but we had limited our own demands to those who were guilty
of gratuitous brutality. As for the condition of Central