Paula the Waldensian | Page 8

the foolish woman I am!"
"No, no, Teresa, go on," answered Catalina between her sobs. "I am
always happy when I hear you speak of our beloved Mamma."

And now, I too could not keep back my tears as I kneeled beside the
old servant, who left her work to pass her hand over my head.
"Thou didst not know her, dear Lisita. How many times during her
sickness she told me especially to take care of thee, and love thee as if I
were thine own mother. Yes, and correct thee also.... At times I ask
myself whether I have obeyed her."
"Oh, Teresa," exclaimed Rosa, interrupting her and closing, with a
bang the book which she had not read. "Indeed, you have done your
duty. What would we have done without you? Of course, I can't say,"
and Rosa smiled, "that your punishments have been very numerous, but
father has taken care of that. Father corrects us and you do the loving
part"
"Now, see here, your father loves you also, and it's only the pain of
having lost your mother that makes him appear more severe than he
really is. Open the window, Rosa, I can hardly see, and I must finish
this stocking before I quit tonight."
Rosa obeyed, and a soft breeze entered, laden with the perfume of the
garden, and Teresa resumed; "After the doctor had gone that afternoon
your mother called me and said, Teresa, tell me the truth. The doctor
believes I am going to die; does he not?' I didn't know what to answer
her. Your father hoped in spite of the doctor's opinion that she'd pull
through, and did not wish me to let your poor mother know that there
was any danger. But here she lay praying me with her joined hands that
I should tell her the truth. She spoke with great difficulty and I feared
that soon she would not be able to speak at all, and therefore weeping,
told her the whole truth."
"And then?
"Then she said to me, 'Teresa, I'm certainly afraid to die! I'm afraid! I'm
afraid!"
"'But,' said I, 'Madame, why should you be afraid? You have always
been so good to everybody. The good God will take you to heaven.' But

she could not be calm.
"'According to the world's standard perhaps yes, Teresa--but before
God! To think that in a few hours I shall be face to face with the Lord
Jesus and I am not prepared!--No, no, let me speak, Teresa! I have done
my duty by my husband and by my children, but I have forgotten God.
I have not loved Him, neither have I prayed to Him and therefore I'm
afraid to meet Him. Oh, Teresa, I'm afraid to die."
"I could only repeat, 'The good God will pardon you, Madame. He is so
good and kind. He will have pity on you, for you have never done any
harm to anybody.'
"'Ah.' she answered, if I had but listened to my sister and brother-in-law!
How many times they urged me in their letters to surrender to the Lord
Jesus, but I always put it off ... and now I'm dying! Oh, Teresa, Teresa,
can you not help me?'"
"But I thought Mamma died in peace?" suddenly questioned Rosa. "I
remember toward the end that she was anxious to go, and at last said
that she was going to heaven."
"Yes, my beloved madame did indeed die in peace. Sometime after she
had asked me whether I could help her she said, 'Teresa, read again that
last letter from my sister. I have it here under my pillow.' I read it to her
as best I could, and as I finished she said to me, 'Read it again, Teresa.
Oh, if only my dear sister were here this minute!" Twice again I read
the letter, but still she was not satisfied. 'Those last words, Teresa, Read
them again to me, please.' And again I read them."
"Do you remember those last words, Teresa?" Catalina asked as she
listened with rapt attention to the story she had heard so often from the
lips of our old servant.
"I don't remember all. I would have liked to have kept the letter. It was
such a letter that would help any one to die, for it was certainly a
treasure. But my poor madame wished to carry it to the tomb with her,
and no doubt it is there yet in her hands, poor little angel. As I

remember it, the letter concluded thus: 'He that believeth on Me hath
everlasting life, and him that cometh to Me I will in no wise cast out!'"
"I read these, the last words of the letter, a dozen times over to her and
she seemed