and improvement of
the Understanding by useful Knowledge, (a thing highly necessary to
the right regulation of the Manners) is commonly very little thought of
in reference to one whole Sex; even by those who in regard of the other,
take due care hereof. But to this omission in respect of one Sex, it is
manifestly very much to be attributed, that that pains which is often
bestow'd upon the other, does so frequently, as it does, prove
ineffectual: Since the actual assistance of Mothers, will (generally
speaking) be found necessary to the right forming of the Minds of their
Children of both Sexes; and the Impressions receiv'd in that tender Age,
which is unavoidably much of it passed among Women, are of
exceeding consequence to Men throughout the whole remainder of their
Lives, as having a strong and oftentimes unalterable influence upon
their future Inclinations and Passions.
As those Persons who afforded that agreeable Conversation I have
mention'd, were the greater part of them Ladies, it was not strange if
they express'd much displeasure at the too general neglect of the
Instruction of their Sex; a Reflection not easily to be avoided by them,
when their thoughts upon the miscarriages and unhappiness of
Mankind in general, terminated in a more peculiar Consideration of
that part which those of their own Condition had in the one, and the
other. Wherein the Conversation concluded where it had begun; the
occasion which introduced it having been the Enquiry of a Lady, What
was the Opinion of one in the Company concerning a Book Intitled
_Conseils d'Ariste sur les Moyens de conserver sa Reputation_? Of
which (she said) she had heard divers Persons of Merit and Quality,
speak very differently: Some as if it contained the most useful
Instructions that could be given for the rendring any young Lady such
as her best Friends could wish she should be; and others, as relishing
too much of an Antiquated severity, not indulgent enough either to the
natural and agreeable Gaiety of Youth, or to that innocent Liberty now
in use, deriv'd like most of our other Fashions, from that Nation where
these Counsels were thought needful.
I remember not the Book you speak of enough to answer to your desire,
(reply'd the Person to whom this Enquiry was address'd) but what you
say is objected to these Conseils is without doubt impertinent, unless
the Precepts therein meant to be condemn'd, are shown to be in
themselves faulty; it being certainly otherwise no matter of exception to
them that they are not Indulgent to what an Age, the Manners whereof
they were intended to correct, had establish'd or found agreeable. This
Objection yet can hardly (I think) be less just, than such a Character of
any Book of this Nature, as some it seems give of this: the Author
whereof pretended not (as I suppose) to so much in his Design, as these
People find in his Performance. And the nature and extent of a
Christian's Duty is but little in their thoughts, who think that any Rules
dictated by Prudence, or Experience of the World, and directed to the
Glory of a good Name, are such Instructions as can render any one
what they ought to be. A solid Vertue can alone do this; the Possession
whereof is infinitely preferable to that of Reputation; with which yet it
is so rarely unattended, that one may affirm there is no so secure and
easie a way (especially for a Lady) to acquire and conserve the
Reputation of being Vertuous, as really to be so.
But Vertue is not (tho often so misrepresented) included in Innocency;
or does consist in a partial Practice of Actions praiseworthy; for its
extent is equal to our liberty of Action; and its Principle the most
Active one of the Mind; Vertue being the natural result of a sincere
desire to conform in all things to the Law set us by our Maker; which
who so truly endeavours, will not find much occasion for such kind of
Advices as the above-mentioned ones, either to correct their Faults, or
teach them to put a mask over them; an ill use sometimes made of this
sort of Instructions: However a better might be, since it is true, that
young People from the Experience of others may learn many things in
reference to their Conduct, the knowledge whereof they would buy too
dear at their own. The difficulty yet that there is in applying general
Rules to particular Cases, makes (I presume) Books of this sort, how
good soever in the kind, of less advantage to those who most need them,
than some imagine them to be.
This which was then said on the Subject of these Conseils (lying by
accident in the way) suggests to
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