My Roomy | Page 6

didn't bother the bug. He cut into one, and it went between Oakes and Whitted like a shot. He come into third standin' up and we was a run to the good. Sallee was so sore he kind o' forgot himself and took pretty near his full wind-up pitchin' to Tommy. And what did Elliott do but steal home and get away with it clean!
Well, you couldn't can him after that, could you? Charlie gets him a room somewheres and I was relieved of his company that night. The next evenin' we beat it for Chi to play about two weeks at home. He didn't tell nobody where he roomed there and I didn't see nothin' of him, 'cep' out to the park. I ast him what he did with himself nights and he says:
"Same as I do on the road--borrow some dough same place and go to the nickel shows."
"You must be stuck on 'em," I says.
"Yes." he says; "I like the ones where they kill people--because I want to learn how to do it. I may have that job some day."
"Don't pick on me," I says.
"Oh," says the bug, "you never can tell who I'll pick on."
It seemed as if he just couldn't learn nothin' about fieldin', and finally John told him to keep out o' the practice.
"A ball might hit him in the temple and croak him," says John. But he busted up a couple o' games for us at home, beatin' Pittsburgh once and Cincy once.

V
They give me a great big room at the hotel in Pittsburgh; so the fellers picked it out for the poker game. We was playin' along about ten o'clock one night when in come Elliott--the earliest he'd showed up since we'd been roomin' together. They was only five of us playin' and Tom ast him to sit in.
"I'm busted," he says.
"Can you play poker?" I ast him.
"They's nothin' I can't do!" he says. "Slip me a couple o' bucks and I'll show you."
So I slipped him a couple o' bucks and honestly hoped he'd win, because I knowed he never had no dough. Well, Tom dealt him a hand and he picks it up and says:
"I only got five cards."
"How many do you want?" I says.
"Oh," he says, "if that's all I get I'll try to make 'em do."
The pot was cracked and raised, and he stood the raise. I says to myself: "There goes my two bucks!" But no--he comes out with three queens and won the dough. It was only about seven bucks; but you'd of thought it was a million to see him grab it. He laughed like a kid.
"Guess I can't play this game!" he says; and he had me fooled for a minute--I thought he must of been kiddin' when he complained of only havin' five cards.
He copped another pot right afterward and was sittin' there with about eleven bucks in front of him when Jim opens a roodle pot for a buck. I stays and so does Elliott. Him and Jim both drawed one card and I took three. I had kings or queens--I forget which. I didn't help 'em none; so when Jim bets a buck I throws my hand away.
"How much can I bet?" says the bug.
"You can raise Jim a buck if you want to," I says.
So he bets two dollars. Jim comes back at him. He comes right back at Jim. Jim raises him again and he tilts Jim right back. Well, when he'd boosted Jim with the last buck he had, Jim says:
"I'm ready to call. I guess you got me beat. What have you got?"
"I know what I've got, all right," says Elliott. "I've got a straight." And he throws his hand down. Sure enough, it was a straight, eight high. Jim pretty near fainted and so did I.
The bug had started pullin' in the dough when Jim stops him.
"Here! Wait a minute!" says Jim. "I thought you had somethin'. I filled up." Then Jim lays down his nine full.
"You beat me, I guess," says Elliott, and he looked like he'd lost his last friend.
"Beat you?" says Jim. "Of course I beat you! What did you think I had?"
"Well," says the bug, "I thought you might have a small flush or somethin'."
When I regained consciousness he was beggin' for two more bucks.
"What for?" I says. "To play poker with? You're barred from the game for life!"
"Well," he says, "if I can't play no more I want to go to sleep, and you fellers will have to get out o' this room."
Did you ever hear o' nerve like that? This was the first night he'd came in before twelve and he orders the bunch out so's he can sleep! We politely suggested to him to go to Brooklyn.
Without sayin' a