My Man Sandy | Page 6

on like a pagan linkie instead
o' the Queen o' Scotland. Weel, it was gey late when we got back to oor
hotel, an' we juist had a bit snack o' supper, an' up the stair we gaed.
We were three stairs up. We had a seat, an' a crack an' a look oot at the
winda, for we saw a lang wey ower the toun, an' it was bonnie to watch
the lichts twinklin' an' to hear the soonds.
Twal o'clock chappit, an' we thocht it was time we were beddit. I was
anower, an' Sandy was juist a' ready, when he cudna fa' in wi' his
nichtkep. It was in a handbag o' Sandy's, and he had left it doon in the
lobby. Sandy canna sleep without his nichtkep--no' him!
"What am I genna do?" says Sandy. He was in his lang white nichtgoon,
and he gaed to the room door an' opened it. He lookit oot, but a'thing
was as quiet's death.
"I'll rin doon for't," says he; "a'body's beddit. I'll juist rin doon, an' I'll
bring up my umberell an' my hat at the same time, for fear they micht
be liftit. You never can tell."
Awa' doou the stairs he gaed in his lang nichtgoon, for a' the earth juist

like some corp escapit frae the kirkyaird. He wasna a meenit oot when I
dreedit something wud happen, an' I juist sat up tremblin' in the bed.
Sandy got doon to the lobby a' richt; an' a'thing was dark, an' as still's
the grave. He scrammilt aboot till he got the bag; syne he fand for his
lum hat, an' put it on his heid. He got his umberell in his oxter, an' the
bag in his hand, an' then he fand roond juist to see if there was naething
else he had forgotten. By ill-fortune he cam' on the handle o' the denner
bell, an' liftin't, it ga'e a creesh an' a clang that knokit a' the sense oot o'
Sandy's heid, and wauken'd half the fowk i' the hoose. Sandy took till
his heels up the stair; an' a gey like picture he was, wi' his lang, white
sark-tails fleein' i' the air, a lum hat on his heid, an umberell in his oxter,
the bag in ae hand, an' the denner bell i' the ither, bangin' an' clangin' at
ilky jump. It wudda frichten'd the very deevil himsel'. The stupid auld
fule had gotten that doited that he cam' fleein' awa' wi' the bell in his
hand.
There was a cry o' fire, and a scream o' murder, an' in half a meenit the
hotel was as busy as gin it had been broad daylicht. Sandy forgot hoo
mony stairs he had to clim', and he gaed bang in on an auld sea captain
an' his wife, in the room below oors. It fair paralised baith o' them,
when they saw Sandy comin' burst in on them wi' his black tile, his
white goon, his umberell an' bag, an' the denner bell.
"P'leece, p'leece," roared the captain an' his wife--an' Sandy oot at the
door. Awa' alang a passage he gaed, fleein' like a huntit tod. I heard
him as gin he'd been doon in the very bowels o' the earth cryin',
"Bawbie, Bawbie! Oh, whaur are ye, Bawbie?"
"Wha i' the earth is he, or what's ado wi' him?" I heard somebody speer.
"Gude kens," said anither voice. "It's shurely some milkman wi' the
bloo deevils."
"Milkman! What wud a milkman do wi' an umberell, a portmanty, an' a
lum hat?"
Juist at that meenit Sandy cam' fleein' alang the passage again, an' by

this time a' the fowk in the hotel were oot on the stairs. If you had only
seen the scrammel. They scoored doon the stairs, into pantries, in
below tables; the room doors were bangin' like thunder, an' Sandy's bell
was ringin' like's Gabriel had lost his trumpet. You never heard sic a
din. I saw him comin' leggin' up the stair. The stairheid was fu' o' fowk,
a' oot in their nicht-goons to see what was ado; but, I can ashure you,
when they saw Sandy comin' fleein' up, they shune disappeared. Six
policemen cudna scattered them so quick. He came spankin' into my
room, an' drappit intil a chair, fair oot o' pech.
"Oh, Bawbie, Bawbie!" he cried, "gi'e's a drink. Tak' that umberell," he
says, haudin' oot the bell to me. "I've been fleein' a' roond Edinboro wi'
naething on but my nicht-goon, an' my lum, an' a' the coal cairters i' the
kingdom ringin' their bells at my tails. Sic a wey o' doin'! O dear me! I
wiss I was hame again! O dear me!"
"That's no an umberell, you doited fule," says I.