My Man Sandy

My Man Sandy, by J. B. Salmond

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Title: My Man Sandy
Author: J. B. Salmond
Release Date: February 7, 2007 [EBook #20540]
Language: English
Character set encoding: ASCII
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Produced by Al Haines

[Frontispiece: Cover Art--Sandy]

MY MAN SANDY
BY
J. B. SALMOND

SIXTH EDITION

SANDS & CO.
EDINBURGH: 37 GEORGE STREET
LONDON: 15 KING STREET, COVENT GARDEN
1919

PREFACE.
These sketches are taken from a series written originally for newspaper purposes. Revision of them has made their author keenly conscious of their defects; but Bawbie and Sandy are characters who might be completely spoiled by improvement. The sketches are therefore presented as they were hastily "rubbed-in" for serial publication.
The "foo," "far," "fat," and "fan" of the Angus dialect have been changed into the more classic "hoo," "whaur," &c.; otherwise the sketches remain in the form in which they have gained quite an unexpected popularity amongst Scottish readers both at home and abroad.
ARBROATH, N.B., April, 1889.

CONTENTS.
I. SANDY SWAPS HIS POWNEY II. SANDY STARTS TO STUDY GEOMETRY III. SANDY AND THE DINNER BELL IV. A TALK ABOUT HEAVEN V. MISTRESS MIKAVER'S TEA PARTY VI. SANDY'S SECOND LESSON IN GEOMETRY VII. SANDY'S MAGIC LANTERN EXHIBITION VIII. SANDY AND THE RHUBARB TART IX. THE GREAT STORM OF NOVEMBER, 1893 X. SANDY AND HIS FAIRNTICKLES XI. SANDY STANDS "EMPIRE" AT A CRICKET MATCH XII. A DREADFUL DISASTER IN THE GARRET XIII. SANDY AND BAWBIE'S SPRING HOLIDAY XIV. LOVE AND WAR XV. SANDY MAKES A SPEECH XVI. SANDY'S CHRISTMAS PRESENT XVII. AT THE SELECT CHOIR'S CONCERT XVIII. SANDY RUNS A RACE XIX. SANDY REVENGED XX. SANDY'S APOLOGIA

MY MAN SANDY.
I
SANDY SWAPS HIS POWNEY.
He's a queer cratur, my man Sandy! He's made, mind an' body o' him, on an original plan a'thegither. He says an' does a' mortal thing on a system o' his ain; Gairner Winton often says that if Sandy had been in the market-gardenin' line, he wudda grown his cabbage wi' the stocks aneth the ground, juist to lat them get the fresh air aboot their ruits. It's juist his wey, you see. I wudna winder to see him some day wi' Donal' yokit i' the tattie-cairt wi' his heid ower the fore-end o't, an' the hurdles o' him whaur his heid shud be. I've heard Sandy say that he had an idea that a horse cud shuve far better than poo; an' when Sandy ance gets an idea intil his heid, there's some beast or body has to suffer for't afore he gets redd o't. If there's a crank wey o' doin' onything Sandy will find it oot. For years he reg'larly flang the stable key ower the gate efter he'd brocht oot Donal' an' the cairt. When he landit hame again, he climbed the gate for the key, an' syne climbed ower again an' opened it frae the ootside. He michta carried the key in his pooch; but onybody cudda dune that! But, as I was sayin', it's juist his wey.
"It's juist the shape original sin's ta'en in Sandy's case," the Gairner said when the Smith an' him were discussin' the subject.
"I dinna ken aboot the sin; but it's original eneuch, there's nae doot aboot that," said the Smith.
There's naebody kens that better than me, for I've haen the teuch end o' forty year o't. But, still an' on, he's my ain man, the only ane ever I had, an' I'll stick up for him, an' till him, while the lamp holds on to burn, as the Psalmist says.
* * * * * *
"See if I can say my geog, Bawbie," said Nathan to me the ither forenicht, as I was stanin' in the shop. He'd been sittin' ben the hoose wi' his book croonin' awa' till himsel' aboot Rooshya bein' boundit on the north by the White Sea, an' on the sooth by the Black Sea, an' some ither wey by the Tooral-ooral mountains or something, an' he cam' ben an' handed me his geog, as he ca'd it, to see if he had a' this palaver on his tongue.
I've often windered what was the use o' Nathan wirryin' ower thae oot-o'-the-wey places that he wud never be within a thoosand mile o'. He kens a' the oots an' ins o' Valiparaiso, but michty little aboot Bowriefauld. Hooever, I suppose the dominie kens best.
Nathan was juist busy pointin' oot the place to me in his book when there was a terriple rattlin' oot on the street, an' aff he hookited to see what was ado. He thocht it was a marriage, an' that there