My Friend Smith | Page 4

me; whereat I fired up again, and said, "Did the
other fellows finish him up?"
"Oh, dear me, yes," said the terrified nurse; "all up, every bit--there
now--and asked for more!"
This consoled me. Presently a doctor came and looked at my forehead,
and left some powders, which I heard him say I was to take in jam three
times a day. I felt still more consoled.
In fact, reader, as you will have judged, I was a little damaged by the
adventure in Side Street, and the noble exploit of my companions and
myself had not ended all in glory.
A day or two after, when I got better, I found out more about it, and
rather painfully too, because my uncle landed one day in my bedroom
and commenced strongly to arraign me before him.
He bade me tell him what had happened, which I did as well as I could.
At the end of it he said, "I suppose you are not aware that for a day or
two it was uncertain whether you had not killed that child that was in
the room?"
"I?" I exclaimed. "I never touched her! Indeed I didn't, uncle!"
"You knocked over the cradle," said my uncle, "and that's much the
same thing."
I was silent. My uncle proceeded.
"And I suppose you are not aware that the barber who tried to take you
down the stairs is now in the hospital with an abscess on his leg, the
result of the kick you gave him?"
"Oh, I can't have done it, uncle--oh, uncle!"

And here I was so overwhelmed with the vision of my enormities and
their possible consequences that I became hysterical, and Mrs Hudson
was summoned to the rescue.
The fact was, in the account of the fray I appear to have got credit for
all the terrible deeds that were there done; and I, Master Freddy
Batchelor, was, it appeared, notorious in the village as having been
guilty of a savage and felonious assault upon one C. Prog, of having
also assaulted and almost "manslaughtered" Miss Prog the younger,
and further of having dealt with my feet against the shin of one
Moppleton, a barber, in such manner as to render him incapable of
pursuing his ordinary avocations, and being chargeable on the parish
infirmary; besides sundry and divers damage to carpets, crockery, glass,
doorposts, kerb-stones, and the jacket of the aforesaid C. Prog. On the
whole, when I arose from my bed and stepped once more into the outer
world, I found myself a very atrocious character indeed.
At home I was in disgrace, and abroad I was not allowed to wander
beyond my uncle's garden, except to church on Sunday under a heavy
escort. So on the whole I had not a very good time of it. My uncle was
terrifically glum, and appeared to think it most audacious if ever I
chanced to laugh or sing or express any sentiment but deep grief and
contrition in his presence. Mrs Hudson read me long lectures about the
evil of slaying small children and laming barbers, and I was
occasionally moved to tears at the thought of my own iniquities. But at
the age of twelve it is hard to take upon oneself the settled gloom of an
habitual criminal, and I was forced to let out at times and think of other
things besides my wicked ways. I got let off school--that was one
alleviation to my woe--and being free of the garden I had plenty of
opportunity of letting off the steam. But it was slow work, as I have
said; and I was really relieved when, a week or two afterwards, my
uncle made the announcement with which this chapter begins.
How I fared, first at Stonebridge House, and subsequently in the City
Life for which it was meant to train me, will be the theme of this
particular veracious history.

CHAPTER TWO.
HOW I MADE MY FIRST ACQUAINTANCE WITH
STONEBRIDGE HOUSE.
The eventful Monday came at last, and with my little box corded up,
with Mrs Hudson as an escort, and a pair of brand-new knickerbockers
upon my manly person, I started off from my uncle's house in the coach
for Stonebridge, with all the world before me.
I had taken a rather gloomy farewell of my affectionate relative in his
study. He had cautioned me as to my conduct, and given me to
understand that at Stonebridge House I should be a good deal more
strictly looked after than I had ever been with him. Saying which he
had bestowed on me a threepenny-bit as "pocket-money" for the term,
and wished me good-bye. Under the circumstances I was not greatly
overcome by this leave- taking, and settled down to make myself
comfortable for