Minna von Barnhelm | Page 5

gentlefolk like
them drive away again from my door! Should I wilfully send such a
prize into the clutches of another innkeeper? Besides, I don't believe
they could have got a lodging elsewhere. The inns are all now quite full.
Could such a young, beautiful, amiable lady remain in the street? Your
master is much too gallant for that. And what does he lose by the
change? Have not I given him another room?

JUST. By the pigeon-house at the back, with a view between a
neighbour's chimneys.
LAND. The view was uncommonly fine, before the confounded
neighbour obstructed it. The room is otherwise very nice, and is
papered--
JUST. Has been!
LAND. No, one side is so still. And the little room adjoining, what is
the matter with that? It has a chimney which, perhaps, smokes
somewhat in the winter--
JUST. But does very nicely in the summer. I believe, Landlord, you are
mocking us into the bargain!
LAND. Come, come; Herr Just, Herr Just--
JUST. Don't make Herr Just's head hot--
LAND. I make his head hot? It is the Dantzig does that.
JUST. An officer, like my master! Or do you think that a discharged
officer, is not an officer who may break your neck for you? Why were
you all, you Landlords, so civil during the war? Why was every officer
an honourable man then and every soldier a worthy, brave fellow?
Does this bit of a peace make you so bumptious?
LAND. What makes you fly out so, Herr Just!
JUST. I will fly out.

SCENE III. Major von Tellheim, Landlord, Just
MAJ. T. (entering). Just!
JUST. (supposing the Landlord is still speaking). Just? Are we so
intimate?
MAJ. T. Just!
JUST. I thought I was "Herr Just" with you.
LAND. (seeing the Major). Hist! hist! Herr Just, Herr Just, look round;
your master--
MAJ. T. Just, I think you are quarreling! What did I tell you?
LAND. Quarrel, your honour? God forbid! Would your most humble
servant dare to quarrel with one who has the honour of being in your
service?
JUST. If I could but give him a good whack on that cringing cat's back
of his!
LAND. It is true Herr Just speaks up for his master, and rather warmly;

but in that he is right. I esteem him so much the more: I like him for it.
JUST. I should like to knock his teeth out for him!
LAND. It is only a pity that he puts himself in a passion for nothing.
For I feel quite sure that your honour is not displeased with me in this
matter, since--necessity--made it necessary--
MAJ. T. More than enough, sir! I am in your debt; you turn out my
room in my absence. You must be paid, I must seek a lodging
elsewhere. Very natural.
LAND. Elsewhere? You are going to quit, honoured sir? Oh,
unfortunate stricken man that I am. No, never! Sooner shall the lady
give up the apartments again. The Major cannot and will not let her
have his room. It is his; she must go; I cannot help it. I will go,
honoured sir--
MAJ. T. My friend, do not make two foolish strokes instead of one.
The lady must retain possession of the room--
LAND. And your honour could suppose that from distrust, from fear of
not being paid, I . . . As if I did not know that your honour could pay
me as soon as you pleased. The sealed purse . . . five hundred thalers in
louis d'ors marked on it--which your honour had in your
writing-desk . . . is in good keeping.
MAJ. T. I trust so; as the rest of my property. Just shall take them into
his keeping, when he has paid your bill--
LAND. Really, I was quite alarmed when I found the purse. I always
considered your honour a methodical and prudent man, who never got
quite out of money . . . but still, had I supposed there was ready money
in the desk--
MAJ. T. You would have treated me rather more civilly. I understand
you. Go, sir; leave me. I wish to speak with my servant.
LAND. But, honoured sir--
MAJ. T. Come, Just; he does not wish to permit me to give my orders
to you in his house.
LAND. I am going, honoured sir! My whole house is at your service.
(Exit.)

SCENE IV. Major Von Tellheim, Just
JUST. (stamping with his foot and spitting after the Landlord). Ugh!
MAJ. T. What is the matter?

JUST. I am choking with rage.
MAJ. T. That is as bad as from plethora.
JUST. And for you sir, I hardly know you any longer. May I die before
your eyes, if you do not encourage this malicious,