Milly Darrell and Other Tales | Page 2

contained
all my most sacred treasures.
I was admitted by a rather ill-tempered-looking housemaid, with a cap
of obtrusive respectability and a spotless white apron. I fancied that she
looked just a little superciliously at my boxes, which I daresay would
not have contained her own wardrobe.
'O, it's the governess-pupil, I suppose?' she said. 'You was expected
early this afternoon, miss. Miss Bagshot and Miss Susan are gone out

to tea; but I can show you where you are to sleep, if you'll please to
step this way. Do you think you could carry one of your trunks, if I
carry the other?'
I thought I could; so the housemaid and I lugged them all the way along
the stone passage and up an uncarpeted back staircase which led from
the lobby into which the door at the end of the passage opened. We
went very high up, to the top story in fact, where the housemaid led me
into a long bare room with ten little beds in it. I was well enough
accustomed to the dreariness of a school dormitory, but somehow this
room looked unusually dismal.
There was a jet of gas burning at one end of the room, near a door
opening into a lavatory which was little more than a cupboard, but in
which ten young ladies had to perform their daily ablutions. Here I
washed my face and hands in icy-cold water, and arranged my hair as
well as I could without the aid of a looking-glass, that being a luxury
not provided at Albury Lodge. The servant stood watching me as I
made this brief toilet, waiting to conduct me to the schoolroom. I
followed her, shivering as I went, to a great empty room on the first
floor. The holidays were not quite over, and none of the pupils had as
yet returned. There was an almost painful neatness and bareness in
place of the usual litter of books and papers, and I could not help
thinking that an apartment in a workhouse would have looked quite as
cheerful. Even the fire behind the high wire guard seemed to burn in a
different manner from all home fires: a fact which I attributed then to
some sympathetic property in the coal, but which I afterwards found to
be caused by a plentiful admixture of coke; a slow sulky smoke went
up from the dull mass of fuel, brightened ever so little now and then by
a sickly yellow flame. One jet of gas dimly lighted this long dreary
room, in which there was no human creature but myself and my guide.
'I'll bring you some supper presently, miss,' the housemaid said, and
departed before I could put in a timid plea for that feminine luxury, a
cup of tea.
I had not expected to find myself quite alone on this first night of my
arrival, and a feeling of hopeless wretchedness came over me as I sat

down at one end of a long green-baize-covered table, and rested my
head upon my folded arms. Of course it was very weak and foolish, a
bad beginning of my new life, but I was quite powerless to contend
against that sense of utter misery. I thought of all I had left at home. I
thought of what my life might have been if my father had been only a
little better off: and then I burst out crying as if my heart were breaking.
Suddenly, in the midst of that foolish paroxysm, I felt a light hand upon
my shoulder, and looking up, saw a face bending over me, a face full of
sympathy and compassion.
O Milly Darrell, my darling, my love, how am I to describe you as you
appeared before my eyes that night? How poorly can any words of
mine paint you in your girlish beauty, as you looked down upon me in
that dimly-lighted schoolroom with divine compassion in your dark
eloquent eyes!
Just at that moment I was so miserable and so inclined to be sulky in
my wretchedness, that even the vision of that bright face gave me little
pleasure. I pushed away the gentle hand ungraciously, and rose hastily
from my seat.
'Pray don't cry any more,' said the young lady; 'I can't bear to hear you
cry like that.'
'I'm not going to cry any more,' I answered, drying my eyes in a hasty,
angry way. 'It was very foolish of me to cry at all; but this place did
look so cheerless and dreary, and I began to think of my father and
mother, and all I had left behind me at home.'
'Of course it was only natural you should think of them. Everything
does seem so bleak and dismal the first night; but