Memoirs of Louis XIV, vol 5 | Page 8

this inspired him
with the desire to come and enjoy at Court a situation so brilliant, and
which so far surpassed what he had a right to expect. But before
speaking of the reception which was given him, and of the incredible
ascendancy he took, let me paint him from the life a little more
completely than I have yet done.
Vendome was of ordinary height, rather stout, but vigorous and active:
with a very noble countenance and lofty mien. There was much natural
grace in his carriage and words; he had a good deal of innate wit, which
he had not cultivated, and spoke easily, supported by a natural boldness,
which afterwards turned to the wildest audacity; he knew the world and
the Court; was above all things an admirable courtier; was polite when
necessary, but insolent when he dared--familiar with common
people--in reality, full of the most ravenous pride. As his rank rose and
his favour increased, his obstinacy, and pig-headedness increased too,
so that at last he would listen to no advice whatever, and was
inaccessible to all, except a small number of familiars and valets. No
one better than he knew the subserviency of the French character, or
took more advantage of it. Little by little he accustomed his subalterns,
and then from one to the other all his army, to call him nothing but
"Monseigneur," and "Your Highness." In time the gangrene spread, and
even lieutenant-generals and the most distinguished people did not dare
to address him in any other manner.
The most wonderful thing to whoever knew the King--so gallant to the
ladies during a long part of his life, so devout the other, and often
importunate to make others do as he did--was that the said King had
always a singular horror of the inhabitants of the Cities of the Plain;
and yet M. de Vendome, though most odiously stained with that
vice--so publicly that he treated it as an ordinary gallantry--never found

his favour diminished on that account. The Court, Anet, the army,
knew of these abominations. Valets and subaltern officers soon found
the way to promotion. I have already mentioned how publicly he placed
himself in the doctor's hands, and how basely the Court acted, imitating
the King, who would never have pardoned a legitimate prince what he
indulged so strangely in Vendome.
The idleness of M. de Vendome was equally matter of notoriety. More
than once he ran the risk of being taken prisoner from mere indolence.
He rarely himself saw anything at the army, trusting to his familiars
when ready to trust anybody. The way he employed his day prevented
any real attention to business. He was filthy in the extreme, and proud
of it. Fools called it simplicity. His bed was always full of dogs and
bitches, who littered at his side, the pops rolling in the clothes. He
himself was under constraint in nothing. One of his theses was, that
everybody resembled him, but was not honest enough to confess it as
he was. He mentioned this once to the Princesse de Conti--the cleanest
person in the world, and the most delicate in her cleanliness.
He rose rather late when at the army. In this situation he wrote his
letters, and gave his morning orders. Whoever had business with him,
general officers and distinguished persons, could speak to him then. He
had accustomed the army to this infamy. At the same time he gobbled
his breakfast; and whilst he ate, listened, or gave orders, many
spectators always standing round.... (I must be excused these
disgraceful details, in order better to make him known).... On shaving
days he used the same vessel to lather his chin in. This, according to
him, was a simplicity of manner worthy of the ancient Romans, and
which condemned the splendour and superfluity of the others. When all
was over, he dressed; then played high at piquet or hombre; or rode out,
if it was absolutely necessary. All was now over for the day. He supped
copiously with his familiars: was a great eater, of wonderful gluttony; a
connoisseur in no dish, liked fish much, but the stale and stinking better
than the good. The meal prolonged itself in theses and disputes, and
above all in praise and flattery.
He would never have forgiven the slightest blame from any one. He

wanted to pass for the first captain of his age, and spoke with indecent
contempt of Prince Eugene and all the others. The faintest contradiction
would have been a crime. The soldier and the subaltern adored him for
his familiarity with them, and the licence he allowed in order to gain
their hearts; for all which he made up by excessive haughtiness towards
whoever was elevated by rank or birth.
On one occasion the