Memoirs of Arthur Hamilton, B. A. Of Trinity College, Cambridge | Page 2

gift of expression
the reflective man becomes a writer, a poet, an artist; without it, he is unknown.
The reflective temperament, existing without any particular gift of expression, wants an
exponent in these times. Reflection is lost sight of; philanthropy is all the rage. I assert
that for a man to devote himself to a reflective life, that is, in the eyes of the world, an
indolent one, is often a great sacrifice, and even on that account, if not essentially,
valuable. Philanthropy is generally distressing, often offensive, sometimes disastrous.
Nothing, in this predetermined world, fails of its effect, as nothing is without its cause.
There is a call to reflection which a man must follow, and his life then becomes an
integral link in the chain of circumstance. Any intentional life affects the world; it is only
the vague drifting existences that pass it by.
The subject of this memoir was, as the world counts reputation, unknown. His only
public appearance, as far as I know, besides the announcement of his birth, is the fact that
his initials stand in a dedication on the title-page of a noble work of fiction.
Arthur Hamilton left me his manuscripts, papers, and letters; from these, and casual
conversations I have had with him in old days, this little volume is constructed.
C.C.
CHAPTER I
He was born November 2, 1852. He was the second son of a retired cavalry officer, who
lived in Hampshire. Besides his elder brother, there were three sisters, one of whom died.
His father was a wealthy man, and had built himself a small country house, and planted
the few acres of ground round it very skillfully. Major Hamilton was a very religious man,
of the self-sufficient, puritanical, and evangelical type, that issues from discipline; a
martinet in his regiment, a domestic tyrant, without intending to be. He did not marry till
rather late in life; and at the time when Arthur was growing up--the time when memory
intwines itself most lingeringly with its surroundings, the time which comes back to us at
ecstatic moments in later, sadder days--all the entourage of the place was at its loveliest.
Nothing ever equalled the thrill, he has told me, of finding the first thrush's nest in the
laurels by the gate, or of catching the first smell of the lilac bushes in spring, or the
pungent scent of the chamomile and wild celery down by the little stream.
The boy acquired a great love for Nature, though not of the intimate kind that poets have
by instinct. "In moments of grief and despair," he wrote in later life, "I do not, as some do,

crouch back to the bosom of the great Mother; she has, it seems, no heart for me when I
am sorry, though she smiles with me when I am glad." But he has told me that he is able
to enjoy a simple village scene in a way that others can not easily understand: a chestnut
crowded with pink spires, the clack of a mill-wheel, the gush of a green sluice out of a
mantled pool, a little stream surrounded by flags and water lobelias, gave him all his life
a keen satisfaction in his happy moments. "I always gravitate to water," he writes. "I
could stop and look at a little wayside stream for hours; and a pool--I never tire of it,
though it awes me when I am alone."
The boy was afraid of trees, as many children are. If he had to go out alone he always
crossed the fields, and never went by the wood; wandering in a wood at night was a
childish nightmare of a peculiarly horrible kind.
I quote a few childish stories about him, selecting them out of a large number.
His mother saying to him one day that the gardener was dead, he burst out laughing (with
that curious hysteria so common in children), and then after a little asked if they were
going to bury him.
His mother, wishing to familiarize him with the idea of continued existence after death,
dwelt on the fact that it was only his body that was going to be buried: his soul was in
heaven.
The boy said presently, "If his body is in the churchyard, and his soul in heaven, where is
David?"
Upon which his mother sent him down to the farm.
He was often singularly old-fashioned in his ways. If he was kept indoors by a childish
ailment, he would draw his chair up to the fire, by his nurse, and say, "Now that the
children are gone out, nurse, we can have a quiet talk." And he always returned first of all
his brothers and sisters, if they were playing in the garden, that he might have