Memoir and Diary of John Yeardley, Minister of the Gospel | Page 9

are only advantageous to us so far as they stimulate to a
closer attention to that inward gift, which alone can enable us to
witness the same experience. It is often a query with me, how am I
spending this precious time, which passes so swiftly away never to

return? and, in order to answer this query aright, how desirable it is to
dwell with thee, sweet solitude! to turn inward, to examine and correct
the defects of our own disordered minds; how delightful it is to walk
alone and contemplate the beautiful scenes of nature. Yet in these
retired moments, when viewing the works of a divine hand springing
up to answer the great end for which they were created, I am often
deeply perplexed with a distressing fear lest I should not be found
coming forward faithfully to answer the end of Him who has created
man for the purpose of his own glory.
The meetings for the discipline of the Society were often times of
spiritual refreshment to him.
6 mo. 23.--I left home to attend our Quarterly Meeting at York. The
meetings for business were generally satisfactory; on re-examining the
answers to the queries, divers very weighty remarks were made. I
thought the two meetings for worship favored seasons; and, although I
left home with reluctance, I cannot but rejoice at having given up a
little time to be made a partaker of the overflowing of that precious
influence which, I trust, made glad the hearts of many present.
The extracts which follow develope still further the progress of his
inner life, and the secret preparation of the future preacher of the
Gospel and overseer of the flock of Christ.
6 mo. 29.--A deep-searching time at meeting yesterday, wherein I was
given to see a little of my own unworthiness The secret breathings of
my spirit were to the Father and fountain of life, that he might be
pleased more and more to redeem me from this corrupted state of
human nature, and draw me by the powerful cords of his love into a
nearer union with the pure spirit of the Gospel.
7 mo. 6.--Thought an awful solemnity was the covering of our small
gathering yesterday morning, under which I felt truly thankful to the
Dispenser of every gift; and was enabled to crave his assistance to
maintain the watch with greater diligence, and pursue the ways of
peace with alacrity of soul.

29th and 30th.--The General Meeting at Ackworth was large, and I
thought very satisfactory through all its different sittings. The meeting
for worship was a remarkable time; the pure spring of gospel ministry
seemed to flow, as from vessel to vessel, until it rose into such
dominion as to declare the gracious presence of Him who is ever
worthy to be honored and adored for thus condescending to own us on
such important occasions. Iron is said to sharpen iron; and I thought it
was a little the case with me at this season, feeling very desirous to
enjoy that within myself which I so much admire in others.
8 mo. 13.--Many days have I gone mourning on my way, for what
cause I know not; but if I can only abide in patience till the day break
and the shadows flee away, then I trust the King of righteousness will
again appear.
25th.--In contemplating a little the character of that good man,
Nehemiah, I cannot but think it worthy our strictest imitation, when we
consider the heartfelt concern he manifested for the welfare of his
people, in saying, "Come and let us build up the wall of Jerusalem, that
we be no more a reproach." This proved him to be a man of a noble
spirit and a disinterested mind, and, I say, worthy our strictest imitation;
for to what nobler purpose can we dedicate our time than in
endeavoring to build up the broken places which are made in the walls
of our Zion?
In the following entry is shown a just insight into the nature of man,
and a discernment of the uses and limits of human knowledge.
Although John Yeardley's talents were not brilliant, and his
opportunities were scanty, he possessed that intellectual thirst which
cannot be slaked but at the fountain of knowledge. At the same time he
was sensitively alive to the necessity of having all his pursuits, of
whatever kind, kept within the golden measure of the Spirit of Truth.
11 mo. 11.--In taking a view of some of the temporal objects to which
my attention has of late been more particularly turned, with a desire to
enlarge my ideas and improve my understanding in some of the more
useful and extended branches of literature, it has excited in me a
considerable degree of caution, lest thereby