Manon Lescaut | Page 9

most perfect recompense of love.
We took a furnished apartment at Paris. in the Rue V----, and, as it
afterwards turned out, to my sorrow, close to the house of M. de B----,
the famous Fermier-general. Three weeks passed, during which I was
so absorbed in my passion, that I never gave a thought to my family,
nor dreamed of the distress which my father probably felt at my
absence. However, as there was yet nothing of profligacy about me,
and as Manon conducted herself with the strictest propriety, the
tranquil life we led served to restore me by degrees to a sense of duty.
I resolved to effect, if possible, a reconciliation with my parent. My
mistress was to me so perfectly lovable, that I could not a doubt her
power of captivating my father, if I could only find the means of
making him acquainted with her good conduct and merit. In a word, I
relied on obtaining his consent to our marriage, having given up all
idea of accomplishing it without his approval. I mentioned the project
to Manon, and explained to her that, besides every motive of filial love
and duty, the weightier one of necessity should also have some
influence; for our finances were sadly reduced, and I began to see the
folly of thinking them, as I once did, inexhaustible.
"Manon received the proposition with considerable coldness. However,
the difficulties she made, being apparently the suggestions of
tenderness alone, or as arising from the natural fear of losing me, if my
father, after learning our address, should refuse his assent to our union,
I had not the smallest suspicion of the cruel blow she was at the very
time preparing to inflict. As to the argument of necessity, she replied
that we had still abundant means of living for some weeks longer, and
that she would then find a resource in the kindness of some relations in
the country, to whom she should write. She tempered her opposition by
caresses so tender and impassioned, that I, who lived only for her, and
who never had the slightest misgiving as to her love, applauded at once
her arguments and her resolutions.
"To Manon I had committed the care of our finances, and the
house-hold arrangements. In a short time, I observed that our style of
living was improved, and that she had treated herself to more expensive
dresses. As I calculated that we could hardly have at this period more
than fifteen or twenty crowns remaining, I did not conceal my surprise

at this mysterious augmentation of our wealth. She begged of me, with
a smile, to give myself no trouble on that head. `Did I not promise you,'
said she, `that I would find resources?' I loved her too purely to
experience the slightest suspicion.
"One day, having gone out in the afternoon, and told her that I should
not be at home so early as usual, I was astonished, on my return, at
being detained several minutes at the door. Our only servant was a
young girl about our own age. On her letting me in at last, I asked why
she had detained me so long? She replied in an embarrassed tone, that
she did not hear me knock. `I only knocked once,' said I; `so if you did
not hear me, why come to open the door at all?' This query
disconcerted her so visibly, that losing her presence of mind, she began
to cry, assuring me that it was not her fault; and that her mistress had
desired her not to open the door until M. de B----had had time to go
down by the back staircase. I was so confounded by this information as
to be utterly unable to proceed to our apartment; and was obliged to
leave the house, under the pretext of an appointment. I desired the girl,
therefore, to let her mistress know that I should return in a few minutes,
but on no account to say that she had spoken to me of M. de B----.
"My horror was so great, that I shed tears as I went along, hardly
knowing from what feeling they flowed. I entered a coffee-house close
by, and placing myself at a table, I buried my face between my hands,
as though I would turn my eyes inward to ascertain what was passing in
my heart. Still, I dared not recall what I had heard the moment before. I
strove to look upon it as a dream; and was more than once on the point
of returning to my lodgings, determined to attach no importance to
what I had heard.
It appeared to me so impossible that Manon could have been unfaithful,
that I feared even to wrong her by a