Lyra Frivola | Page 9

fathers' swords, those commoners and peers,--
Demobilized their Army Corps--dismissed their Volunteers: Soft
Sentiment o'erthrew the bars that nations disunite,
And Greece, in
Freedom's sacred name, annexed the Isle of Wight.
[1. Transcriber's note: The phrase "To Kurio" was transliterated from
the Greek as follows: "To"--Tau, omega; "Kurio"--Kappa, upsilon, rho,
iota, omega.]
THE ROAD TO RENOWN
If it still is your luck to be left in the ruck,
and of fame you're an impotent seeker,
If you fruitlessly aim at a
Senate's acclaim
when you can't catch the eye of the Speaker,
If whenever you rise you
observe with surprise
that the House is perceptibly thinner,
And your eloquent pleas are a
sign to M.P.'s
that it's nearly the time for their dinner:
Should you sigh for the heights where the eminent lights,
in the region of letters who shine, are;
Should your novels and tales
have indifferent sales
and your verses be hopelessly minor,
Should the public refuse your
attempts to peruse
when you try to instruct or to shock it,
While it adds to the spoils of
its Barries and Doyles,
and increases the hoards of a Crockett:
If you're baffled, in short, by the fame that you court,

and your name's overlooked by the papers,--
There's a road to success
without toil or distress,
or nocturnal consumption of tapers:
By adopting this plan you're a
prominent man,
and no longer a painful aspirant:
You must come on the scene as a
bold Philhellene,
and a foe to the Turk and the Tyrant!
You'll orate to the crowd on the heritage proud
which by Greece is bequeathed to the nations
(You can gain in a
week an acquaintance with Greek
by a liberal use of translations),
And the names that you quote with
the aid of your "Grote"
and a noble assumption of choler,
Will attest that you feel that
excusable zeal
which belongs to an eminent scholar.
You will prate before mobs of Lord Salisbury's jobs
and the villainous schemes of the Kaiser,
Which will make them
believe you've a plan up your sleeve
if they'd only take you for adviser;
You may cheerfully speak of
assisting the Greek
'gainst the foes that his country environ:
'Tis improbable quite you'll
be wanted to fight,
and the phrase will remind them of Byron.
If you can't get a place in Society's race,

and you have to confess that you're beaten,
Yet I hope I have shown
you may make yourself known
by espousing the cause of the Cretan:
You will sell all your works by
denouncing the Turks,
and the public will hasten to read 'em,
When in reverent tones you are
mentioned as "Jones,
the Defender and Champion of Freedom!"
L'AFFAIRE (CHAPTER ONE)
It was a little Bordereau that lay upon the ground:
The Franco-Gallic
Government that document it found,
And straightway drew the
inference, though how I do not know, Some Jew had sold to Germany
this dreadful Bordereau.
'Tis all (they said) a Hebrew trick---a treasonable plan-- And, now we
come to think of it, why Dreyfus is the man!
At any rate (they argued
thus), it is for him to show
That he is not the criminal who sold the
Bordereau.
Some hinted at another man, whose autograph it bore--
But this was
Dreyfus' artifice, and proved his guilt the more: No motive for the
horrid deed confessedly he had:
And crimes which are gratuitous are
nearly twice as bad.
They caught that Jew (did Government) and charged him with the sale;
They proved his guilt--or said they did--and shut him up in gaol; And
then, their case to justify and show their verdict true, They took and
baited every one who called himself a Jew.
These incidents an uproar caused like Donnybrook its Fair: Wherever
Frenchmen met to talk 'twas Pandemonium there:
And anywhere
except in France you'd argue from events
That Ministers had rather
lost the public confidence.

Then spake the German Government (and here I must deplore The fact
that they had not presumed to mention it before): "Although," they said
respectfully, "we would not interfere With any Angelegenheit outside
our proper sphere--
Why make this quite-essentially-unnecessary fuss?
This
compromising document was never sold to us:
Potztausend!" said the
Chancellor, "upon my honour, no!
We have not got and do not want
your precious Bordereau!"
This rather struck the Ministers, in Paris where they sat: They took and
read the Bordereau: they had not yet done that. 'Twas found to mention
obvious facts which any one might know-- No horrid revelations lurked
within the Bordereau!
And did they set poor Dreyfus free, the due amends to make, Regain
the public confidence by owning their mistake,
And cease for
popularity by sordid means to bid?
These are the things they might
have done; but this is what they did:--
They said, those Gallic Ministers, "Undoubtedly it's true The document
has not been sold, and is not worth a sou; But as the man's in prison
now, why,