King Arthurs Socks and Other Village Plays

King Arthur's Socks and Other Village Plays

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Title: King Arthur's Socks and Other Village Plays
Author: Floyd Dell
Release Date: September, 2004 [EBook #6587] [Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule] [This file was first posted on December 29, 2002]
Edition: 10
Language: English
Character set encoding: ASCII
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KING ARTHUR'S SOCKS AND OTHER VILLAGE PLAYS
BY FLOYD DELL

PREFATORY NOTE
These plays, with one exception, were written in Greenwich Village, and, with another exception, first performed there--some at the old Liberal Club, and others by the Provincetown Players. They are souvenirs of an intellectual play-time which, being dead, deserves some not-too-solemn memorial.
F. D.

CONTENTS
HUMAN NATURE: A Very Short Morality Play,
THE CHASTE ADVENTURES OF JOSEPH: A Comedy,
THE ANGEL INTRUDES: A Comedy,
LEGEND: A Romance,
SWEET-AND-TWENTY: A Comedy,
A LONG TIME AGO: A Tragic Fantasy,
ENIGMA: A Domestic Conversation,
IBSEN REVISITED: A Piece of Foolishness,
KING ARTHUR'S SOCKS: A Comedy,
THE RIM OF THE WORLD: A Fantasy,
POOR HAROLD: A Comedy,

HUMAN NATURE

A VERY SHORT MORALITY PLAY

TO ARTHUR DAVISON FICKE
This is a much changed version of "A Five Minute Problem Play," originally given at the Liberal Club, New York City, in 1913.
_Boundless blue space. Two celestial figures stand in front of it, talking. One of them carries a pointer, such as is used in class-room demonstrations at the blackboard. The other has a red-covered guidebook under his arm_.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE (_the one with the pointer_) Well, I think that is all. You've seen everything now.
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE (_the One With the guidebook_) It has all been very interesting, and I don't know how to thank you for the trouble you've taken.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Don't mention it. That's my business, you know--to show young and curious Spirits what there is to see in the universe. And I must say that you've been an exceptionally patient pupil. I don't usually take as much time with youngsters as I have with you. But when I find someone as interested in the universe as you are, I don't mind spending a few more eons on the job. We've been all around, this trip. I don't believe we've missed anything of any importance. But if there is anything else you can think of that you'd like to see--
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. (_hesitantly_) Well, there is one place . . . It's only mentioned in a footnote in the guide-book, but for that very reason I thought perhaps--
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. You have the right attitude. There's nothing too small or insignificant to know about. Do you remember the name of the place?
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. No, but--(_He turns the leaves of the guide-book_.) Here it is. (He holds the book closer so as to read the fine print at the bottom of the page.) Earth, it's called.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Ah, yes, there is such a place. . . .
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. The guide-book doesn't give any information about it. Just mentions its name.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Well, there isn't very much to say about it. After what you've seen, you wouldn't be impressed by its art or its architecture, . . . Still, it has one curious feature that perhaps you'd be interested in. It's--
He pauses.
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. Yes?
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Perhaps I had better just show you, and let you make what you can of it.
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. (_deferentially_) As you say.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Here, then--look for yourself!
_He raises the pointer, and boundless space rolls up like a curtain, disclosing a comfortable drawing-room. The two celestial figures stand aside and look. A man and woman are sitting on a sofa, kissing each other. From time to time, in intervals between the kisses, they speak_.
THE MAN. No! No! I must not!
But he does.
THE WOMAN. No! No! We must not!
But they do.
THE MAN. We must not--
_The second celestial figure turns