Keeping up with Lizzie | Page 8

can't,' says I. 'You'll be drownin' the miller. They'll leave you.'
"'It won't do 'em any good,' says he. 'Bill an' Eph will make their prices agree with mine.'
"'Folks will go back to the land, as I have,' says I.
"'They don't know enough,' says Sam. 'Farmin' is a lost art here in the East. You take my word for it--they'll pay our prices--they'll have to--an' the rich folks, they don't worry about prices. I pay a commission to every steward an' butler in this neighborhood.'
"'I won't help you,' says I. 'It's wicked. You ought to have saved your money.'
"'In a year from now I'll have money to burn,' he says. 'For one thing, my daughter's education is finished, an' that has cost heavy.'
"'How much would it cost to unlearn it?' I asked. 'That's goin' to cost more than it did to get it, I'm 'fraid. In my opinion the first thing to do with her is to uneducate her.'
"That was like a red-hot iron to Sam. It kind o' het him up.
"'Why, sir, you don't appreciate her,' says he. 'That girl is far above us all here in Pointview. She's a queen.'
"'Well, Sam,' I says, 'if there's anything you don't need just now it's a queen. If I were you I wouldn't graft that kind o' fruit on the grocery-tree. Hams an' coronets don't flourish on the same bush. They have a different kind of a bouquet. They don't harmonize. Then, Sam, what do you want of a girl that's far above ye? Is it any comfort to you to be despised in your own home?'
"'Mr. Potter, I haven't educated her for my own home or for this community, but for higher things,' says Sam.
"'You hairy old ass! The first you know,' I says, 'they'll have your skin off an' layin' on the front piaz' for a door-mat.'
"Sam started for the open air. I hated to be ha'sh with him, but he needed some education himself, an' it took a beetle an' wedge to open his mind for it. He lifted his chin so high that the fat swelled out on the back of his neck an' unbuttoned his collar. Then he turned an' said: 'My daughter is too good for this town, an' I don't intend that she shall stay here. She has been asked to marry a man o' fortune in the old country.'
"'So I surmised, an' I suppose you find that the price o' husbands has gone up,' I says.
"Sam didn't answer me.
"'They want you to settle some money on the girl--don't they?' I asked.
"'My wife says it's the custom in the old country,' says Sam.
"'Suppose he ain't worth the price?'
"'They say he's a splendid fellow,' says Sam.
"'You let me investigate him,' I says, 'an' if he's really worth the price I'll help ye to pay it.'
"Sam said that was fair, an' thanked me for the offer, an' gave me the young man's address. He was a Russian by the name of Alexander Rolanoff, an' Sam insisted that he belonged to a very old family of large means an' noble blood, an' said that the young man would be in Pointview that summer. I wrote to the mayor of the city in which he was said to live, but got no answer.
"Alexander came. He was a costly an' beautiful young man, about thirty years old, with red cheeks an' curly hair an' polished finger-nails, an' wrote poetry. Sometimes ye meet a man that excites yer worst suspicions. Your right hand no sooner lets go o' his than it slides down into your pocket to see if anything has happened; or maybe you take the arm o' yer wife or yer daughter an' walk away. Aleck leaned a little in both directions. But, sir, Sam didn't care to know my opinion of him. Never said another word to me on the subject, but came again to ask about the money.
"'Look here, Sam,' I says. 'You tell Lizzie that I want to have a talk with her at four o'clock in this office? If she really wants to buy this man, I'll see what can be done about it.'
"'All right, you talk with her,' says he, an' went out.
"In a few minutes Dan showed up.
"'Have you seen Lizzie?' says I.
"'Not to speak to her,' says Dan. 'Looks fine, doesn't she?'
"'Beautiful!'I says. 'How is Marie Benson?'
"'Oh, the second time I went to see her she was trying to keep up with Lizzie,' says he. 'She's changed her gait. Was going to New York after a lot o' new frills. I suppose she thought that I wanted a grand lady. That's the trouble with all the girls here. A man might as well marry the real thing as an imitation. I wish Lizzie would get down off her high horse.'
"'She's goin' to