Jane Talbot | Page 3

convinced me that he was at all times
selfish and irascible beyond most other men, and that his ingratitude
and insolence to his mother were only congenial parts of the character
he afterwards displayed at large.
My brother and I passed our infancy in one unintermitted quarrel. We
were never together but he played some cruel and mischievous prank,
which I never failed to resent to the utmost of my little power. I soon
found that my tears only increased his exultation, and my complaints
only grieved my mother. I, therefore, gave word for word and blow for
blow; but, being always worsted in such conflicts, I shunned him
whenever it was possible, and whatever his malice made me suffer I
endeavoured to conceal from her.

My mother, on her death-bed, was anxious to see him, but he had
strolled away after some boyish amusement, with companions as
thoughtless as himself. The news of her death scarcely produced an
hour's seriousness. He made my affliction a topic of sarcasm and
contempt.
To soften my grief, my father consented to my living under the care of
her whom I now call my mother. Mrs. Fielder was merely the intimate
from childhood of my own mother, with whom, however, since her
marrage, contracted against Mrs. Fielder's inclination and
remonstrances, she had maintained but little intercourse. My mother's
sudden death and my helpless age awakened all her early tenderness,
and induced her to offer an asylum to me. Having a considerable
fortune and no family, her offer, notwithstanding ancient jealousies,
was readily accepted by my father.
My new residence was, in many respects, the reverse of my former one.
The treatment I received from my new parent, without erasing the
memory of the old one, quickly excited emotions as filial and tender as
I had ever experienced. Comfort and quiet, peace and harmony,
obsequious and affectionate attendants and companions, I had never
been accustomed to under the paternal roof.
From this period till I was nearly sixteen years of age, I merely paid
occasional visits to my father. He loved me with as much warmth as his
nature was capable of feeling, which I repaid him in gratitude and
reverence. I never remitted my attention to his affairs, and studied his
security and comfort as far as these were within my power.
My brother was not deficient in talents, but he wanted application.
Very early he showed strong propensities to active amusement and
sensual pleasures. The school and college were little attended to, and
the time that ought to have been appropriated to books and study was
wasted in frolics and carousals. As soon as he was able to manage a
gun and a horse, they were procured; and these, and the company to
which they introduced him, afforded employment for all his attention
and time.

My father had devoted his early years to the indefatigable pursuit of
gain. He was frugal and abstemious, though not covetous, and amassed
a large property. This property he intended to divide between his two
children, and to secure my portion to his nephew, whom his parents had
left an orphan in his infancy, and whom my father had taken and
treated as his own child by marrying him to me. This nephew passed
his childhood among us. His temper being more generous than my
brother's, and being taught mutually to regard each other as destined to
a future union, our intercourse was cordial and affectionate.
We parted at an age at which nothing like passion could be felt. He
went to Europe, in circumstances very favourable to his improvement,
leaving behind him the expectation of his returning in a few years.
Meanwhile, my father was anxious that we should regard each other
and maintain a correspondence as persons betrothed. In persons at our
age, this scheme was chimerical. As soon as I acquired the power of
reflection, I perceived the folly of such premature bonds, and, though I
did not openly oppose my father's wishes, held myself entirely free to
obey any new impulse which circumstances might produce. My mother
(so let me still call Mrs. Fielder) fully concurred in my views.
You are acquainted, my friend, with many events of my early life. Most
of those not connected with my father and his nephew, I have often
related. At present, therefore, I shall omit all collateral and
contemporary incidents, and confine myself entirely to those connected
with these two persons.
My father, on the death of his wife, retired from business, and took a
house in an airy and secluded situation. His household consisted of a
housekeeper and two or three servants, and apartments were always
open for his son.
My brother's temper grew more unmanageable as he increased in years.
My father's views with regard to