Jane Eyre | Page 4

There were moments when I was bewildered by the terror

he inspired, because I had no appeal whatever against either his
menaces or his inflictions; the servants did not like to offend their
young master by taking my part against him, and Mrs. Reed was blind
and deaf on the subject: she never saw him strike or heard him abuse
me, though he did both now and then in her very presence, more
frequently, however, behind her back.
Habitually obedient to John, I came up to his chair: he spent some three
minutes in thrusting out his tongue at me as far as he could without
damaging the roots: I knew he would soon strike, and while dreading
the blow, I mused on the disgusting and ugly appearance of him who
would presently deal it. I wonder if he read that notion in my face; for,
all at once, without speaking, he struck suddenly and strongly. I
tottered, and on regaining my equilibrium retired back a step or two
from his chair.
"That is for your impudence in answering mama awhile since," said he,
"and for your sneaking way of getting behind curtains, and for the look
you had in your eyes two minutes since, you rat!"
Accustomed to John Reed's abuse, I never had an idea of replying to it;
my care was how to endure the blow which would certainly follow the
insult.
"What were you doing behind the curtain?" he asked.
"I was reading."
"Show the book."
I returned to the window and fetched it thence.
"You have no business to take our books; you are a dependent, mama
says; you have no money; your father left you none; you ought to beg,
and not to live here with gentlemen's children like us, and eat the same
meals we do, and wear clothes at our mama's expense. Now, I'll teach
you to rummage my bookshelves: for they ARE mine; all the house
belongs to me, or will do in a few years. Go and stand by the door, out

of the way of the mirror and the windows."
I did so, not at first aware what was his intention; but when I saw him
lift and poise the book and stand in act to hurl it, I instinctively started
aside with a cry of alarm: not soon enough, however; the volume was
flung, it hit me, and I fell, striking my head against the door and cutting
it. The cut bled, the pain was sharp: my terror had passed its climax;
other feelings succeeded.
"Wicked and cruel boy!" I said. "You are like a murderer -- you are like
a slave-driver -- you are like the Roman emperors!"
I had read Goldsmith's History of Rome, and had formed my opinion of
Nero, Caligula, &c. Also I had drawn parallels in silence, which I never
thought thus to have declared aloud.
"What! what!" he cried. "Did she say that to me? Did you hear her,
Eliza and Georgiana? Won't I tell mama? but first -- "
He ran headlong at me: I felt him grasp my hair and my shoulder: he
had closed with a desperate thing. I really saw in him a tyrant, a
murderer. I felt a drop or two of blood from my head trickle down my
neck, and was sensible of somewhat pungent suffering: these sensations
for the time predominated over fear, and I received him in frantic sort. I
don't very well know what I did with my hands, but he called me "Rat!
Rat!" and bellowed out aloud. Aid was near him: Eliza and Georgiana
had run for Mrs. Reed, who was gone upstairs: she now came upon the
scene, followed by Bessie and her maid Abbot. We were parted: I heard
the words -
"Dear! dear! What a fury to fly at Master John!"
"Did ever anybody see such a picture of passion!"
Then Mrs. Reed subjoined -
"Take her away to the red-room, and lock her in there." Four hands
were immediately laid upon me, and I was borne upstairs.

CHAPTER II
I resisted all the way: a new thing for me, and a circumstance which
greatly strengthened the bad opinion Bessie and Miss Abbot were
disposed to entertain of me. The fact is, I was a trifle beside myself; or
rather OUT of myself, as the French would say: I was conscious that a
moment's mutiny had already rendered me liable to strange penalties,
and, like any other rebel slave, I felt resolved, in my desperation, to go
all lengths.
"Hold her arms, Miss Abbot: she's like a mad cat."
"For shame! for shame!" cried the lady's-maid. "What shocking
conduct, Miss Eyre, to strike a young gentleman, your benefactress's
son! Your young master."
"Master! How is he my master? Am I a