Jackanapes | Page 8

an honorable boy, and a
kind-hearted boy. But you are--in short, you are a Boy, Jackanapes.
And I hope,"--added Miss Jessamine, desperate with the results of
experience--"that the General knows that Boys will be Boys."
What mischief could be foreseen, Jackanapes promised to guard against.
He was to keep his clothes and his hands clean, to look over his
catechism, not to put sticky things in his pockets, to keep that hair of
his smooth--("It's the wind that blows it, Aunty," said Jackanapes--"I'll
send by the coach for some bear's-grease," said Miss Jessamine, tying a
knot in her pocket-handkerchief)--not to burst in at the parlor door, not
to talk at the top of his voice, not to crumple his Sunday frill, and to sit
quite quiet during the sermon, to be sure to say "sir" to the General, to
be careful about rubbing his shoes on the doormat, and to bring his
lesson-books to his aunt at once that she might iron down the dogs' ears.
The General arrived, and for the first day all went well, except that
Jackanapes' hair was as wild as usual, for the hair-dresser had no
bear's-grease left. He began to feel more at ease with his grandfather,
and disposed to talk confidentially with him, as he did with the
Postman. All that the General felt it would take too long to tell, but the
result was the same. He was disposed to talk confidentially with
Jackanapes.
[Illustration]
"Mons'ous pretty place this," he said, looking out of the lattice on to the
Green, where the grass was vivid with sunset, and the shadows were
long and peaceful.
"You should see it in Fair-week, sir," said Jackanapes, shaking his
yellow mop, and leaning back in his one of the two Chippendale
arm-chairs in which they sat.
"A fine time that, eh?" said the General, with a twinkle in his left eye.
(The other was glass.)

Jackanapes shook his hair once more. "I enjoyed this last one the best
of all," he said. "I'd so much money."
"By George, it's not a common complaint in these bad times. How
much had ye?"
"I'd two shillings. A new shilling Aunty gave me, and elevenpence I
had saved up, and a penny from the Postman--sir!" added Jackanapes
with a jerk, having forgotten it.
"And how did ye spend it--sir?" inquired the General. Jackanapes
spread his ten fingers on the arms of his chair, and shut his eyes that he
might count the more conscientiously.
"Watch-stand for Aunty, threepence. Trumpet for myself, twopence,
that's fivepence. Ginger-nuts for Tony, twopence, and a mug with a
Grenadier on for the Postman, fourpence, that's elevenpence.
Shooting-gallery a penny, that's a shilling. Giddy-go-round, a penny,
that's one and a penny. Treating Tony, one and twopence. Flying Boats
(Tony paid for himself), a penny, one and threepence. Shooting-gallery
again, one and fourpence; Fat Woman a penny, one and fivepence.
Giddy-go-round again, one and sixpence. Shooting-gallery, one and
sevenpence. Treating Tony, and then he wouldn't shoot, so I did, one
and eightpence. Living Skeleton, a penny--no, Tony treated me, the
Living Skeleton doesn't count. Skittles, a penny, one and ninepence.
Mermaid (but when we got inside she was dead), a penny, one and
tenpence. Theatre, a penny (Priscilla Partington, or the Green Lane
Murder. A beautiful young lady, sir, with pink cheeks and a real pistol),
that's one and elevenpence. Ginger beer, a penny (I was so thirsty!) two
shillings. And then the Shooting-gallery man gave me a turn for
nothing, because, he said, I was a real gentleman, and spent my money
like a man."
"So you do, sir, so you do!" cried the General. "Why, sir, you spend it
like a prince.--And now I suppose you've not got a penny in your
pocket?"
"Yes I have," said Jackanapes. "Two pennies. They are saving up." And

Jackanapes jingled them with his hand.
"You don't want money except at fair-times, I suppose?" said the
General.
Jackanapes shook his mop.
"If I could have as much as I want, I should know what to buy," said
he.
"And how much do you want, if you could get it?"
"Wait a minute, sir, till I think what twopence from fifteen pounds
leaves. Two from nothing you can't, but borrow twelve. Two from
twelve, ten, and carry one. Please remember ten, sir, when I ask you.
One from nothing you can't, borrow twenty. One from twenty, nineteen,
and carry one. One from fifteen, fourteen. Fourteen pounds nineteen
and--what did I tell you to remember?"
"Ten," said the General.
"Fourteen pounds nineteen shillings and tenpence then, is what I want,"
said Jackanapes.
"Bless my soul, what for?"
"To buy Lollo with. Lollo means red, sir. The Gipsy's red-haired pony,
sir. Oh, he is beautiful! You should see his coat in the sunshine!