Impressions of America | Page 9

Bordenton next morning by
six o'clock, to take the early boat for Philadelphia.
About three o'clock A.M. I was roused by my host, who brought me a
light. He had made a good guess at the time; but it would have been as
well had he slept an hour or two later. My horse was soon got ready,
and I set forward to feel my way, with an assurance that I had nothing
to do but keep right a-head, the road being as straight as a hickory pole.
The morning was fine, but cold: the stars yet twinkled brightly; but
their light did not suffice to make my way very clear to me; so I
followed my directions implicitly, and for some time briskly. Unluckily,
a sea of mist was to be passed as I went through the low grounds; and,
whilst in this, I could not discern my horse's ears for the soul of me,
notwithstanding that the punctuality of the steamer demanded that I
should lose no time.
I had a good nag under me, however, and rattled on merrily enough,
thinking to myself what a very priggish person it must have been who
first promulgated the saying, that no wise traveller ever quits his hostel
before the sun gets up, or remains out of it after the sun has gone to bed.
"There were no steamers at six A.M. in those times," said I to myself,
as I conned over the musty aphorism; "and travelling must have been
done by this methodical person at a very slow pace." At this moment I
heard the rattle of boards, and became aware that I was on a bridge: I
instantly reined up, when, rattle! up tilts some loose plank, and in goes
one of my nag's legs up to the shoulder. To fall back upon his haunches,
make a rear up, and, in answer to a sharp blow of the spur, suddenly to
bolt over something and into somewhere, was the action of a moment:
in the tumble, that succeeded his leap, I got a couple of confounded
hard raps on the side of the head, which convinced me I had not lighted
among feathers.
My horse was either the most stunned or the most frightened, for I was
first on my feet; and after scrambling up a hank below the end of the
bridge, I made shift to urge my nag to get on his legs and regain the
road.

My upper story was a good deal confused, but knowing there was no
time to be lost, after ascertaining that the horse's knees were not broken,
and that my bones though shaken were all whole, up I got and away we
started, with a new, and, as it turned out, a bad departure. I
congratulated myself on being so easily let off; for, had a plank turned
on the middle of the bridge instead of the extremity, the forward spring
of my horse would have precipitated us into the river, which was less
desirable infinitely than the dry ditch down whose bank we had rolled.
On I pushed, and up got the day, slowly but, brightly enough: a spire
appeared in view, and I considered myself at Bordenton; the village
was quickly gained, but proved some place unknown to me. On I went,
and about a quarter of an hour after saw a second spire. "Here we are in
port at last, thank Heaven," said I, for never did sixteen miles appear so
long to me: but no, all was yet strange, not a point could I recognise. At
a moment when my perplexity was complete--for, though confused, I
felt assured I had covered more than the ground lying between my
harbours--I saw a man with a horse and cart leaving a yard upon some
early errand: riding up to him therefore, I inquired,
"Pray, sir, how far is it to Bordenton?"
"Exactly eighteen miles," was the answer.
I conceived at first that my question was not rightly understood;
therefore, to make all sure, reiterated the inquiry, adding, "I mean
Bordenton, where Joseph Bonaparte lives."
"When he's there, you mean," says the man: "I guess I mean that too."
"Bordenton eighteen miles off!" ejaculated I. "My friend, it's not
possible; either you or I must be a little mad!"
"I'm quite the contrary," observed my sharp-witted informant, "bein'
uncommon sensible; I don't know how you feel about the head
notwithstanding."
I now began to imagine he was quizzing me; therefore, in order to

make him feel that my questions were urged in anything but a jesting
spirit, I made known my object in taking the road thus early, and
concluded by saying,
"I have been riding for two hours on the way to Bordenton, being but
sixteen miles distant from