Hell Fer Sartain | Page 5

preacher lived up thar?'' he asked.
``Yes,'' I said, breathlessly.
In the door-way just then stood the girl with a bonnet in her hand, and
at a nod from him they started up the hill towards the cottage. They
came down again after a while, he stalking ahead, and she, after the
mountain fashion, behind. And after this fashion I saw them at sunset
next day pass over the bridge and into the mouth of the Gap whence
they came. Through this Gap come strange people and strange tales
from the Kentucky hills. Over it, sometimes, is the span of a rainbow.

A TRICK O' TRADE
Stranger, I'm a separATE man, an' I don't inQUIZite into no man's
business; but you ax me straight, an' I tell ye straight: You watch ole
Tom!
Now, I'll take ole Tom Perkins' word agin anybody's 'ceptin' when hit

comes to a hoss trade ur a piece o' land. Fer in the tricks o' sech, ole
Tom 'lows-- well, hit's diff'ent; an' I reckon, stranger, as how hit sorter
is. He was a-stayin' at Tom's house, the furriner was, a-dickerin' fer a
piece o' lan'--the same piece, mebbe, that you're atter now-- an' Tom
keeps him thar fer a week to beat him out'n a dollar, an' then won't let
him pay nary a cent fer his boa'd. Now, stranger, that's Tom.
Well, Abe Shivers was a-workin' fer Tom--you've heerd tell o' Abe--an'
the furriner wasn't more'n half gone afore Tom seed that Abe was up to
some of his devilMINT. Abe kin hatch up more devilMINT in a minit
than Satan hisself kin in a week; so Tom jes got Abe out'n the stable
under a hoe-handle, an' tol' him to tell the whole thing straight ur he'd
have to go to glory right thar. An' Abe tol'!
'Pears like Abe had foun' a streak o' iron ore on the lan', an' had racked
his jinny right down to Hazlan an' tol' the furriner, who was thar
a-buyin' wild lands right an' left. Co'se, Abe was goin' to make the
furriner whack up fer gittin' the lan' so cheap. Well, brother, the furriner
come up to Tom's an' got Tom into one o' them new- fangled trades
whut the furriners calls a option--t'other feller kin git out'n hit, but you
can't. The furriner 'lowed he'd send his podner up thar next day to put
the thing in writin' an' close up the trade. Hit looked like ole Tom was
ketched fer shore, an' ef Tom didn't ra'r, I'd tell a man. He jes let that
hoe- handle drap on Abe fer 'bout haffen hour, jes to give him time to
study, an' next day thar was ole Tom a-settin' on his orchard fence
a-lookin' mighty unknowin', when the furriner's podner come a-prancin'
up an' axed ef old Tom Perkins lived thar.
Ole Tom jes whispers.
Now, I clean fergot to tell ye, stranger, that Abe Shivers nuver could
talk out loud. He tol' so many lies that the Lawd--jes to make things
even--sorter fixed Abe, I reckon, so he couldn't lie on more'n one side
o' the river at a time. Ole Tom jes knowed t'other furriner had tol' this
un 'bout Abe, an,' shore 'nough, the feller says, sorter soft, says he:
``Aw, you air the feller whut foun' the ore?''

Ole Tom--makin' like he was Abe, mind ye--jes whispers: ``Thar hain't
none thar.''
Stranger, the feller mos' fell off'n his hoss. ``Whut?'' says he. Ole Tom
kep' a-whisperin': ``Thar hain't no coal-- no nothing; ole Tom Perkins
made me tell t'other furriner them lies.''
Well, sir, the feller WAS mad. ``Jes whut I tol' that fool podner of
mine,'' he says, an' he pull out a dollar an' gives hit to Tom. Tom jes
sticks out his han' with his thum' turned in jes so, an' the furriner says,
``Well, ef you can't talk, you kin make purty damn good signs''; but he
forks over four mo' dollars (he 'lowed ole Tom had saved him a pile o'
money), an' turns his hoss an' pulls up agin. He was a-gittin' the land so
durned cheap that I reckon he jes hated to let hit go, an' he says, says he:
``Well, hain't the groun' rich? Won't hit raise no tabaccy nur corn nur
nothin'?''
Ole Tom jes whispers:
``To tell you the p'int-blank truth, stranger, that land's so durned pore
that I hain't nuver been able to raise my voice.''
Now, brother, I'm a separATE man, an' I don't inQUIZite into no man's
business-- but you ax me straight an' I tell ye straight. Ole Tom Perkins
kin trade with furriners, fer he have l'arned their ways. You watch ole
Tom!

GRAYSON'S BABY
The first snow sifted in through the Gap