Girls: Faults and Ideals | Page 4

careful enough as to their
associates and companions. Some of them are seen with young men
who are known to be of questionable moral character. On the streets
they talk loudly, so as unconsciously to attract attention to themselves.
They act so that young men of the looser sort will stare at them and
even dare to speak to them." In these and other ways, certain young
women, this writer says, imperil their own good name, and, I may add,
imperil their souls.
When will young girls learn that modesty and shrinking from public
gaze are the invariable marks of true beauty in womanhood; and that
anything which is contrary to these is a mark of vulgarity and
ill-breeding? Guard your name as the jewel of your life. Many a young
woman with pure life has lived under shadows all her later years,
because of some careless--only careless, not wrong--act in youth which
had the appearance of evil.
In one letter received from a thoughtful young man, mention is made of
a "disregard of health," as a common fault in young women. Another
mentions but one fault,--"the lack of glad earnestness." Another
specifies, "thoughtlessness, heedlessness, a disregard of the feelings of
others," Another thinks some young women "so weak and dependent
that they incur the risk of becoming a living embodiment of the wicked
proverb, 'So good that they are good for nothing.'" On the other hand,
however, one writer deplores just the reverse of this, the tendency in
young women to be independent, self-reliant, appearing not to need

protection and shelter.
Doubtless there is truth in both those criticisms: there are some young
women who are so dainty, so accomplished, so delicate, that they can
be of little use in this world. When misfortune comes to such and they
are thrown out of the cosy nest, they are in a most pitiable condition
indeed. They can do nothing to provide for themselves. Then there are
others who so pride themselves on their independence, that one of the
sweetest charms of womanhood is lost--the charm of gentle
trustfulness.
I have suggested enough faults for one lesson,--perhaps as many as you
can carry in your mind, certainly as many as you can correct, although I
have not exhausted the list that I find in my correspondence. As I said
at the beginning, these faults are pointed out, not in the spirit of
criticism, but in the spirit of kindness, of truest interest, and with desire
to help. Many of them may seem very trivial faults, but small specks
stain the whiteness of a fair robe. "Little things make perfection." You
cannot afford to keep the least discovered fault in your character or
conduct, for little blemishes are the beginnings of greater ones that by
and by will destroy all the beauty of life.
"It is the little rift within the lute That by and by will make music mute,
And, ever widening, slowly silence all-- The little rift within the lover's
lute: Or little pitted speck in garnered fruit, That rotting inward, slowly
moulders all."
Will you not, then, pray this prayer: "Cleanse thou me from secret
faults"? Do not try to hide your faults--hiding them does not cure them.
Every true woman wants to grow into perfect moral and spiritual
beauty. In order to do this, she wants to know wherein she fails, what
blemishes others see in her, what blemishes God sees in her. Then, as
quickly as she discovers the faults, she wants to have them removed.
The old artist Apelles had for his motto: "_Nulla dies sine linea_"--"No
day without a line." Will you not take this motto for yours, and seek
every day to get the victory over some little blemish, to get some fault
corrected, to get in your life a little more of the beauty of perfect
womanhood? Cleanse thou me, O Lord, from secret faults.
Now I turn your thoughts away from faults to ideals. The second
question was: "What are some of the essential elements of character in
your ideal of true young womanhood?" Here also I can give only very

few of the answers received.
Nearly every one emphasizes the element of gentleness. One says: "I
like to see a young lady kind and agreeable to all, yet dignified."
"Gentle in speech, voice, and manner; full of love for her home, yet
firm and decided in her convictions," says another. One sums up his
ideal in these particulars: "An unspotted character, a cheerful
disposition, a generous, untiring heart, and a brave will." Nearly all put
strength with gentleness, in some form. "All the firmness that does not
exclude delicacy, and all the softness that does not imply weakness.
Loving, helpful, and trusting, she must be able to soothe anxiety by her
presence; charm