Farm Ballads | Page 3

think it queer?If we loved each other the better because we quarreled here.
HOW BETSEY AND I MADE UP.
GIVE us your hand, Mr. Lawyer: how do you do to-day?
"GIVE US YOUR HAND, MR. LAWYER: HOW DO YOU DO TO-DAY?"
You drew up that paper--I s'pose you want your pay.?Don't cut down your figures; make it an X or a V;?For that 'ere written agreement was just the makin' of me.
Goin' home that evenin' I tell you I was blue,?Thinkin' of all my troubles, and what I was goin' to do;?And if my hosses hadn't been the steadiest team alive,?They'd 've tipped me over, certain, for I couldn't see where to drive.
No--for I was laborin' under a heavy load;?No--for I was travelin' an entirely different road;?For I was a-tracin' over the path of our lives ag'in,?And seein' where we missed the way, and where we might have been.
And many a corner we'd turned that just to a quarrel led,?When I ought to 've held my temper, and driven straight ahead; And the more I thought it over the more these memories came, And the more I struck the opinion that I was the most to blame.
And things I had long forgotten kept risin' in my mind,?Of little matters betwixt us, where Betsey was good and kind; And these things flashed all through me, as you know things sometimes will?When a feller's alone in the darkness, and every thing is still.
"But," says I, "we're too far along to take another track,?And when I put my hand to the plow I do not oft turn back;?And 'tain't an uncommon thing now for couples to smash in two;" And so I set my teeth together, and vowed I'd see it through.
When I come in sight o' the house 'twas some'at in the night, And just as I turned a hill-top I see the kitchen light;
"AND JUST AS I TURNED A HILL-TOP I SEE THE KITCHEN LIGHT."
Which often a han'some pictur' to a hungry person makes,?But it don't interest a feller much that's goin' to pull up stakes.
And when I went in the house the table was set for me--?As good a supper's I ever saw, or ever want to see;?And I crammed the agreement down my pocket as well as I could, And fell to eatin' my victuals, which somehow didn't taste good.
And Betsey, she pretended to look about the house,?But she watched my side coat pocket like a cat would watch a mouse: And then she went to foolin' a little with her cup,?And intently readin' a newspaper, a-holdin' it wrong side up.
"AND INTENTLY READIN' A NEWSPAPER, A-HOLDIN' IT WRONG SIDE UP."
And when I'd done my supper I drawed the agreement out,?And give it to her without a word, for she knowed what 'twas about; And then I hummed a little tune, but now and then a note?Was bu'sted by some animal that hopped up in my throat.
Then Betsey she got her specs from off the mantel-shelf,?And read the article over quite softly to herself;?Read it by little and little, for her eyes is gettin' old,?And lawyers' writin' ain't no print, especially when it's cold.
And after she'd read a little she give my arm a touch,?And kindly said she was afraid I was 'lowin' her too much;?But when she was through she went for me, her face a-streamin' with tears, And kissed me for the first time in over twenty years!
"AND KISSED ME FOR THE FIRST TIME IN OVER TWENTY YEARS!"
I don't know what you'll think, Sir--I didn't come to inquire-- But I picked up that agreement and stuffed it in the fire;?And I told her we'd bury the hatchet alongside of the cow;?And we struck an agreement never to have another row.
And I told her in the future I wouldn't speak cross or rash If half the crockery in the house was broken all to smash;?And she said, in regards to heaven, we'd try and learn its worth By startin' a branch establishment and runnin' it here on earth.
And so we sat a-talkin' three-quarters of the night,?And opened our hearts to each other until they both grew light; And the days when I was winnin' her away from so many men?Was nothin' to that evenin' I courted her over again.
Next mornin' an ancient virgin took pains to call on us,?Her lamp all trimmed and a-burnin' to kindle another fuss;?But when she went to pryin' and openin' of old sores,?My Betsey rose politely, and showed her out-of-doors.
"MY BETSEY ROSE POLITELY, AND SHOWED HER OUT-OF-DOORS."
Since then I don't deny but there's been a word or two;?But we've got our eyes wide open, and know just what to do: When one speaks cross the other just meets it with a laugh, And the first one's ready to give up considerable more than half.
Maybe you'll think me soft,