Fair Harbor | Page 4

self-respect and the pride which were wounded sorest. That he--he--Sears Kendrick, the independent autocrat of the quarter deck, should be reduced to this! That it was wringing his soul she knew. He had never complained except to her, and even to her very, very seldom, but she knew. And she ventured to ask the question she had wanted to ask ever since he had sufficiently recovered to listen to conversation.
"Sears," she said "I haven't said a word before, and you needn't tell me now if you don't want to--it isn't any of my business--but is it true that you've lost a whole lot of money? It isn't true, is it?"
He had been standing by the open door, looking out into the yard. Now he turned to look at her.
"What isn't true, Sarah?" he asked.
"That you've lost a lot of money in--in that--that business you went into. It isn't true, is it, Sears? Oh, I hope it isn't! They say--why, some of 'em say you've lost all the money you had put by. An awful sight of money, they say. Sears, tell me it isn't true--please."
He regarded her in silence for a moment. Then he shook his head.
"Part of it isn't true, Sarah," he answered, with a slight smile. "I haven't lost a big lot of money."
"Oh, I'm so glad. Now I can tell 'em a few things, I guess."
"I wouldn't tell 'em too much, because the other part is true. I have lost about all I had put by."
"Oh, Sears!"
"Um--hm. And served me right, of course. You can't make a silk ear out of a sow's purse, as old Cap'n Sam Doane used to love to say. You can't, no matter how good a purse--or--ear--it is. I was a pretty good sea cap'n if I do say it, but that wasn't any reason why I should have figured I was a good enough business man to back as slippery an eel as Jim Carpenter in the ship chandlery game ashore."
"But--you----" Mrs. Macomber hesitated to utter the disgraceful word, "you didn't fail up, did you, Sears?" she faltered. "You know that's what they say you did."
"Well, they say wrong. Carpenter failed, I didn't. I paid dollar for dollar. That's why I've got next to no dollars now."
"But you--you've got some, Sears. You must have," hopefully, "because you've been paying me board. So you must have some left."
The triumph in her face was pathetic. He hated to disturb her faith.
"Yes," he said dryly, "I have some left. Maybe seven hundred dollars or some such matter. If I had my legs left it would be enough, or more than enough. I wouldn't ask odds of anybody if I was the way I was before that train went off the track. I'd lost every shot I had in the locker, but I'm not very old yet--some years to leeward of forty--there was more money to be had where that came from and I meant to have it. And then--well, then this happened to me."
"I know. And to think that you was comin' down here on purpose to see me when it did happen. Seems almost as if I was to blame, somehow."
"Nonsense! Nobody was to blame but the engineer that wrecked the train and the three hundred pound woman that fell on my legs. And the engineer was killed, poor fellow, and the woman was--well, she carried her own punishment with her, I guess likely. Anyhow, I should call it a punishment if I had to carry it. There, there, Sarah! Let's talk about somethin' else. You do your dishes and, long as you won't let me help you, I'll hop-and-go-fetch-it out to that settee in the front yard and look at the scenery. Just think! I've been in Bayport almost four months and haven't been as far as that gate yet--except when they lugged me in past it, of course. And I don't recall much about that."
"I guess not, you poor boy. And I saw them bringin' you in, all stretched out, with your eyes shut, and as white as---- Oh, my soul and body! I don't want to think about it, let alone talk about it."
"Neither do I, Sarah, so we won't. Do you realize how little I know of what's been goin' on in Bayport since I was here last? And do you realize how long it has been since I was here?"
"Why, yes, I do, Sears. It's been almost six years; it will be just six on the tenth of next September."
The speech was illuminating. He looked at her curiously.
"You do keep account of my goin's and comin's, don't you, old girl?" he said. "Better than I do myself."
"Oh, it means more to me than it does to you. You live such a busy life, Sears, all over the world,