Erik Dorn | Page 2

the dim things old senses could
feel in the night though he chose to laugh at them.
But one thing Erik didn't know, and the old man, turning from his chair,
grew sad. What was that? What? His thought mumbled a question.
Sitting motionless in a corner of the room he could smile at Erik and
his smile under the white beard seemed to give an answer to the
mumble--an answer that irritated his son. The answer said, "Wait, wait!
it is too early for you to say you have lived." What a son, what a son!
whose eyes made fun of his father's white hair.
The old man moved slowly as if his infirmities were no more than
meditations, and entered the house.
CHAPTER II
The crowds moving through the streets gave Erik Dorn a picture. It was
morning. Above the heads of the people the great spatula-topped
buildings spread a zigzag of windows, a scribble of rooftops against the
sky. A din as monotonous as a silence tumbled through the streets--an
unvarying noise of which the towering rectangles of buildings tilted
like great reeds out of a narrow bowl, seemed an audible part.
The city alive with signs, smoke, posters, windows; falling, rising,
flinging its chimneys and its streets against the sun, wound itself up
into crowds and burst with an endless bang under the far-away sky.
Moving toward his office Erik Dorn watched the swarming of men and
women of which he was a part. Faces like a flight of paper scraps
scattered about him. Bodies poured suddenly across his eyes as if
emptied out of funnels. The ornamental entrances of buildings pumped
figures in and out. Vague and blurred like the play of gusty rain, the

crowds darkened the pavements.
Dorn saluted the spectacle with smiling eyes. As always, in the aimless
din and multiplicity of streets he felt himself most securely at home.
The smear of gestures, the elastic distortion of crowds winding and
unwinding under the tumult of windows, gave him the feeling of a
geometrical emptiness of life.
Here before him the meanings of faces vanished. The greedy little
purposes of men and women tangled themselves into a generality. It
was thus Dorn was most pleased to look upon the world, to observe it
as one observes a pattern--involved but precise. Life as a whole lay in
the streets--a little human procession that came toiling out of a
yesterday into an interminable to-morrow. It presented itself to him as a
picture--legs moving against the walls of buildings, diagonals of bodies,
syncopating face lines.
Things that made pictures for his eyes alone diverted Dorn. Beyond this
capacity for diversion he remained untouched. He walked smiling into
crowds, oblivious of the lesser destinations of faces, pleased to dream
of his life and the life of others as a movement of legs, a bobbing of
heads.
His appreciation of crowds was typical. In the same manner he held an
appreciation of all things in life and art which filled him with the
emotion of symmetry. He had given himself freely to his tastes. A
creed had resulted. Rhythm that was intricate pleased him more than
the metronomic. In art, the latter was predominant. In life, the former.
Out of these decisions he achieved almost a complete indifference to
literature and especially toward painting. No drawn picture stirred him
to the extent that did the tapestry of a city street. No music aroused the
elation in him that did the curious beat upon his eyes of window rows,
of vari-shaped building walls whose oblongs and squares translated
themselves in his thought into a species of unmelodious but perfect
sound.
The preoccupation with form had developed in him as complement of
his nature. The nature of Erik Dorn was a shallows. Life did not live in

him. He saw it as something eternally outside. To himself he seemed at
times a perfect translation of his country and his day.
"I'm like men will all be years later," he said to his wife, "when their
emotions are finally absorbed by the ingenious surfaces they've
surrounded themselves with, and life lies forever buried behind the
inventions of engineers, scientists, and business men."
Normal outwardly, a shrewd editor and journalist, functioning daily in
his home and work as a cleverly conventional figure, Dorn had lived
since boyhood in an unchanging vacuum. He had in his early youth
become aware of himself. As a young man he had waited half
consciously for something to happen to him. He thought of this
something as a species of contact that would suddenly overtake him.
He would step into the street and find himself a citizen absorbed by
responsibilities, ideas, sympathies, prejudices. But the thing had never
happened. At thirty he had explained to himself, "I am