Epistles from Pap | Page 7

. . You see, all
the officers here work for each other. . . They just got up and nominated
each other and that was all there was to it. It is very hard on me coming
in at the middle of the year and have just barely gotten acquainted.
Nearly all of the Senior Class are officers and I am a private, and being
as there are so many officers it is nearly impossible for a private to get
anything.
But there is one thing that I didn't get left in and that was Scholarship.
They have here what they call the Upper Ten. That is the ten students

who have the highest grades in the whole school. These ten get their
names put in the school publication. I was fourth on the list of ten out
of 84 scholars, and first in the senior class . . . My general average was
95 percent.
Are you taking care of my shotgun? Have you had it cleaned out?
Where is it? . . .
HELP THE KIDS START OUT BUT DON'T HURRY THEM
(Andrew and Aura May Sawyer had a prolonged engagement. The
reason becomes clearer upon reading this letter, written surreptitiously
by Pap's future father-in-law, F. P. Sawyer, of Muscatine, Iowa, to
Pap's father, James V. Durham, in Greencastle. This is not one of Pap's
own letters, but is interesting nevertheless for what it says about family
values).
Muscatine, Iowa February 17, 1909 J.V. Durham Greencastle, Ind.
Dear Sir: I suppose as is quite natural, you are giving some thought to
the approaching happiness of Andrew, as we are to that of Aura May;
so you will understand my motive in writing you direct, and without
the knowledge of either Aura May or Andrew. . .
I think you probably know our suggestion as to building a moderate
house to rent to them, but as we have never boiled it down to exact
conditions (only the general idea), you may not understand just what
we contemplate.
You are unquestionably as mindful of what your son does, as we are as
to ours; but the boys are expected to "look out for themselves" more
than the girls; yet had it not been for my father's help, both as to
judgment and moderately financially in the way of a gift at majority
and loans to help me start (which I later repaid) I would not have been
able to succeed or don't think I would--as I have. And the gift of $500
after the wedding from my father-in-law was not without big
appreciation on my part. A few years later, when I was building a
moderate home on a lot bought with part of the $500, which my wife
had not invested in special furniture, and some I had saved, he gave us
$2,000 more to help build the home. I certainly appreciated it, and put
the home all in her name. Later, after we moved and it was sold, I
returned the money to her and she still has it.
My own experience and observation convinces me that the best time to
help young people who show qualities . . . is when it will do them the

most good, which I think is when they are starting out, and not after
they have slaved along and shown their ability to take care of
themselves (though it does often bring out their best qualities quicker,
but they don't need the help so much then). I don't mean that one should
go so far as to lessen their realization that they must "support
themselves", but the first three or four years are hard for young people
who have to make it all without some help.
But I don't believe in hurrying such a move. First, they should wait to
see if their love for each other promises to be what should exist to
insure the desired future, and secondly, 'til they can feel fairly assured
that they can be self-supporting or are willing to live as the husband
can reasonably afford.
In this generation, what were luxuries to us in younger days are to a
degree necessities to those who have been brought up with them, so
that the problem is not exactly as it was in the pioneer days, when good
health, no debts, a job at $1.25 per day, three economically furnished
rooms and enough to pay the preacher were all that were required. . .
I explained to both Aura and Andrew a couple of conditions I thought
advisable before I could approve their setting the day. First, satisfaction
that they had not, or were not apt to change their minds as to each other,
and secondly, that he should have demonstrated his ability to earn or
have in