Caesars Column | Page 4

alight in the sea, even in stormy weather, with as much
adroitness as a sea-gull. In fact, a whole population of air-sailors has grown up to manage
these ships, never dreamed of by our ancestors. The speed of these aerial vessels is, as
you know, very great--thirty-six hours suffices to pass from New York to London, in
ordinary weather. The loss of life has been less than on the old-fashioned steamships; for,
as those which go east move at a greater elevation than those going west, there is no
danger of collisions; and they usually fly above the fogs which add so much to the
dangers of sea-travel. In case of hurricanes they rise at once to the higher levels, above
the storm; and, with our increased scientific knowledge, the coming of a cyclone is
known for many days in advance; and even the stratum of air in which it will move can
be foretold.
I could spend hours, my dear brother, telling you of the splendor of this hotel, called The
Darwin, in honor of the great English philosopher of the last century. It occupies an
entire block from Fifth Avenue to Madison Avenue, and from Forty-sixth Street to
Forty-seventh. The whole structure consists of an infinite series of cunning adjustments,
for the delight and gratification of the human creature. One object seems to be to relieve
the guests from all necessity for muscular exertion. The ancient elevator, or "lift," as they
called it in England, has expanded until now whole rooms, filled with ladies and
gentlemen, are bodily carried up from the first story to the roof; a professional musician
playing the while on the piano--not the old-fashioned thing our grandmothers used, but a

huge instrument capable of giving forth all sounds of harmony from the trill of a
nightingale to the thunders of an orchestra. And when you reach the roof of the hotel you
find yourself in a glass-covered tropical forest, filled with the perfume of many flowers,
and bright with the scintillating plumage of darting birds; all sounds of sweetness fill the
air, and many glorious, star-eyed maidens, guests of the hotel, wander half seen amid the
foliage, like the houris in the Mohammedan's heaven.
But as I found myself growing hungry I descended to the dining-room. It is three hundred
feet long: a vast multitude were there eating in perfect silence. It is considered bad form
to interrupt digestion with speech, as such a practice tends to draw the vital powers, it is
said, away from the stomach to the head. Our forefathers were expected to shine in
conversation, and be wise and witty while gulping their food between brilliant passages. I
sat down at a table to which I was marshaled by a grave and reverend seignior in an
imposing uniform. As I took my seat my weight set some machinery in motion. A few
feet in front of me suddenly rose out of the table a large upright mirror, or such I took it
to be; but instantly there appeared on its surface a grand bill of fare, each article being
numbered. The whole world had been ransacked to produce the viands named in it;
neither the frozen recesses of the north nor the sweltering regions of the south had been
spared: every form of food, animal and vegetable, bird, beast, reptile, fish; the foot of an
elephant, the hump of a buffalo, the edible bird-nests of China; snails, spiders, shell-fish,
the strange and luscious creatures lately found in the extreme depths of the ocean and
fished for with dynamite; in fact, every form of food pleasant to the palate of man was
there. For, as you know, there are men who make fortunes now by preserving and
breeding the game animals, like the deer, the moose, the elk, the buffalo, the antelope, the
mountain sheep and goat, and many others, which but for their care would long since
have become extinct. They select barren regions in mild climates, not fit for agriculture,
and enclosing large tracts with wire fences, they raise great quantities of these valuable
game animals, which they sell to the wealthy gourmands of the great cities, at very high
prices.
I was perplexed, and, turning to the great man who stood near me, I began to name a few
of the articles I wanted. He smiled complacently at my country ignorance, and called my
attention to the fact that the table immediately before me contained hundreds of little
knobs or buttons, each one numbered; and he told me that these were connected by
electric wires with the kitchen of the hotel, and if I would observe the numbers attached
to any articles in the bill of fare which I desired, and would touch the corresponding
numbers of the knobs