Cabbages and Kings | Page 3

may distribute copies of this etext electronically, or by disk, book
or any other medium if you either delete this "Small Print!" and all
other references to Project Gutenberg, or:
[1] Only give exact copies of it. Among other things, this requires that
you do not remove, alter or modify the etext or this "small print!"
statement. You may however, if you wish, distribute this etext in
machine readable binary, compressed, mark-up, or proprietary form,
including any form resulting from conversion by word pro- cessing or
hypertext software, but only so long as *EITHER*:
[*] The etext, when displayed, is clearly readable, and does *not*
contain characters other than those intended by the author of the work,
although tilde (~), asterisk (*) and underline (i) characters may be used
to convey punctuation intended by the author, and additional
characters may be used to indicate hypertext links; OR
[*] The etext may be readily converted by the reader at no expense into
plain ASCII, EBCDIC or equivalent form by the program that displays
the etext (as is the case, for instance, with most word processors); OR
[*] You provide, or agree to also provide on request at no additional
cost, fee or expense, a copy of the etext in its original plain ASCII form
(or in EBCDIC or other equivalent proprietary form).
[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small
Print!" statement.
[3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits
you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate
your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due.
Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg
Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following
each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your
annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return.
WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU
DON'T HAVE TO?

The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning
machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright
licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money
should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon
University".
We are planning on making some changes in our donation structure in
2000, so you might want to email me, [email protected] beforehand.

*END THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN
ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END*

Digitized for Project Gutenberg by Earle C. Beach
([email protected]) Italicized text is bracketed by ~'s.

CABBAGES AND KINGS
by O Henry

Contents
The Proem "Fox-in-the-Morning" The Lotus and the Bottle Smith
Caught Cupid's Exile Number Two The Phonograph and the Graft
Money Maze The Admiral The Flag Paramount The Shamrock and the
Palm The Remnants of the Code Shoes Ships Masters of Arts Dicky
Rouge et Noir Two Recalls The Vitagraphoscope

CABBAGES AND KINGS
The Proem

By the Carpenter
They will tell you in Anchuria, that President Miraflores, of that
volatile republic, died by his own hand in the coast town of Coralio;
that he had reached thus far in flight from the inconveniences of an
imminent revolution; and that one hundred thousand dollars,
government funds, which he carried with him in an American leather
valise as a souvenir of his tempestuous administration, was never
afterward recovered.
For a ~real~, a boy will show you his grave. It is back of the town near
a little bridge that spans a mangrove swamp. A plain slab of wood
stands at its head. Some one has burned upon the headstone with a hot
iron this inscription:
RAMON ANGEL DE LAS CRUZES Y MIRAFLORES
PRESIDENTE DE LA REPUBLICA DE ANCHURIA QUE SEA SU
JUEZ DIOS
It is characteristic of this buoyant people that they pursue no man
beyond the grave. "Let God be his judge!"--Even with the hundred
thousand unfound, though they greatly coveted, the hue and cry went
no further than that.
To the stranger or the guest the people of Coralio will relate the story of
the tragic end of their former president; how he strove to escape from
the country with the publice funds and also with Dona Isabel Guilbert,
the young American opera singer; and how, being apprehended by
members of the opposing political party in Coralio, he shot himself
through the head rather than give up the funds, and, in consequence, the
Senorita Guilbert. They will relate further that Dona Isabel, her
adventurous bark of fortune shoaled by the simultaneous loss of her
distinguished admirer and the souvenir hundred thousand, dropped
anchor on this stagnant coast, awaiting a rising tide.
They say, in Coralio, that she found a prompt and prosperous tide in the
form of Frank Goodwin, an American resident of the town, an investor
who had grown wealthy by dealing in the products of the country--a

banana king, a rubber prince, a sarsaparilla, indigo and mahogany
baron. The Senorita