Bounty Hunters, Map Makers Gold Miners | Page 6

made by the bounty hunters Preston and Garrett. He proposed that to keep their legacy alive, their bounty awards should all be extended until 50 years from their death. The speech was a real tear-jerker.
A few folks tried to question the validity of some of Mitchell's emotional claims. Some tried to ask about the source of his campaign contributions and his status as honorary bounty hunter. A couple of independent bounty hunters said they would be willing to bring in the bad guys for the usual size bounty, that they didn't need payments for 50 years after their death. But all these nay-sayers were booed out of the meeting room. And the "Bounty Hunter Legacy Act" became law.
Galen, son of Garrett, had not been at the meeting because he was out in the mountains on the trail of a stagecoach bandit. After some time, he followed the bandit to an old shack in the hills, and there, Galen captured him. Galen hauled him back to Eureka and told the sheriff about the shack. The sheriff sent some deputies out to tear down the shack, and then he gave Galen a receipt for his reward. Galen looked at it and was surprised to see it say he'd get paid his reward for 50 years after his death.
"What am I going to do with reward money when I'm dead, sheriff?"
"You can pass it to your kin."
"I don't have any kin. And besides, if I did and they helped me bring in this guy, I'd split the reward with them now. That's what my pa did when we rode together. I wouldn't make anyone who pulled pistols beside me to wait until after I died before they got paid."
"Eureka passed an ordinance that all bounties are to be paid until 50 years after the bounty hunter dies."
"Well, I set out to catch that stagecoach bandit for a lot less than that. I won't take it. Just give me the old reward."
"The law says I have to pay you a bounty for 50 years after you die. I'm the sheriff, and I can't break the law."
"But the town don't have to pay me that much."
"You'll have to talk with the Mayor about making an exception."
Galen rode over to visit Mayor Mitchell. The mayor was overseeing the construction of his new office.
"Mighty fine building you're putting up there, mayor."
"Galen, fellow bounty hunter, how are you?"
"Fellow bounty hunter? You never had hot lead flying at you your whole life. What are you talking about?"
"I'm an honorary member only, of course. Irving even gave me a badge and certificate and everything."
"Irving, aye?"
"Yes, sir. Good ol' Irving. He's been supporting the Mayor's office since he took over IP Inc."
"Supporting the office?" Galen was more than a little suspect. "Or supporting you?"
"Well, the taxes his company pays is part of what's paying for this new building for the mayor's office."
"Wait a minute. You tax the people of Eureka so that you can pay our bounties. And then you tax the bounties to pay for your buildings? Don't that seem odd?"
"It's all perfectly legal."
"But you pass the laws around here, so you're the one making it legal. And your laws are set up so that the more Irving benefits the more you benefit, and the citizens are the one footing the bill."
"It's all very complicated, Galen. You make it sound as if I were stealing something from the very citizens I represent."
"You keep having the people pay bigger and bigger bounties to Irving. And then Irving turns around and uses those huge bounties to give you a big fat campaign contribution. Over in Dodge City, they call that a kickback and it's illegal."
"Dodge City is overrun with criminals. We pay bounties that are generous enough that bounty hunters will bring the criminals off the streets."
"Dodge City has no more crime than we do. And they pay out a lot less in bounties, which is why I came here in the first place. I don't want a bounty that lasts 50 years after I die. The people of Eureka shouldn't have to pay me that much."
"I can't be making special exceptions for every bounty hunter that wants to negotiate a different price."
"You did for Irving. It's just that he negotiated the price up and gave you a piece of the action."
"Look, Galen. If you think the people are paying too high a bounty, you can keep what you think is fair, and give the rest of it back to the people."
"Meanwhile, Irving is making out like a bandit and you keep getting your piece of the pie."
"I don't expect you to understand the nuances of how government works, so I'll take that comment as a reflection of your ignorance."
"Oh, I know how it works alright, and it stinks like Sam's slaughterhouse