Belinda | Page 4

been all right.
DELIA (seriously). What really happened, mummy? I'm grown up now,
so I think you ought to tell me.
BELINDA (thoughtfully). That was about all, you know ... except for
his beard.
DELIA. Had he a beard? (Laughing.) How funny!
BELINDA (roaring with laughter, in which DELIA joins). Yes, dear, it
was; but he never would see it. He took it quite seriously.
DELIA. And did you say dramatically, "If you really loved me, you'd
take it off"?
BELINDA (apologetically). I'm afraid I did, darling.
DELIA. And what did he say?
BELINDA. He said--very rudely--that, if I loved him, I'd do my hair in
a different way.
DELIA (sinks down on her haunches, facing the audience). How
ridiculous!
BELINDA (touching her hair). Of course, I didn't do it like this then. I
suppose we never ought to have married, really.
DELIA. Why did you?
BELINDA. Mother rather wanted it. (Solemnly.) Delia, never get
married because your mother---- Oh, I forgot; I'm your mother.
DELIA. And I don't want a better one ... (They embrace.) And so you
left each other?
BELINDA. Yes.

DELIA. But, darling, didn't you tell him there was going to be a Me?
BELINDA. Oh no!
DELIA. I wonder why not?
BELINDA. Well, you see, if I had, he might have wanted to stay.
DELIA. But----
BELINDA (hurt). If he didn't want to stay for me, I didn't want him to
stay for you. (Penitently.) Forgive me, darling, but I didn't know you
very well then. We've been very happy together, haven't we?
DELIA (going to the hammock, sitting in it and dangling her legs). I
should think we have.
BELINDA (leaning back in chair). I don't want to deny you anything,
and, of course, if you'd like a stepfather (looking down modestly) or
two--
DELIA. Oh, you have been enjoying yourself.
BELINDA. Only you see how awkward it would be if Jack turned up in
the middle of the wedding, like--like Eugene Aram.
DELIA. Enoch Arden, darling.
BELINDA. It's very confusing their having the same initials. Perhaps
I'd better call them both E. A. in future and then I shall be safe. Well,
anyhow it would be awkward, darling, wouldn't it? Not that I should
know him from Adam after all these years--except for a mole on his left
arm.
DELIA. Perhaps Adam had a mole.
BELINDA. No, darling; you're thinking of Noah. He had two.
DELIA (thoughtfully). I wonder what would happen if you met

somebody whom you really did fall in love with?
BELINDA (reproachfully). Now you're being serious, and it's April.
DELIA. Aren't these two--the present two--serious?
BELINDA. Oh no! They think they are, but they aren't a bit, really.
Besides, I'm doing them such a lot of good. I'm sure they'd hate to
marry me, but they love to think they're in love with me, and--I love it,
and--and they love it, and--and we all love it.
DELIA (rising and crossing to BELINDA). You really are the biggest,
darlingest baby who ever lived. (Kisses her.) Do say I shan't spoil your
lovely times.
BELINDA (surprised). Spoil them? Why, you'll make them more
lovely than ever.
DELIA (turning away and sitting on table). Well, but do they know
you have a grown-up daughter?
BELINDA (suddenly realizing and sitting up). Oh!
DELIA. It doesn't really matter, because you don't look a day more than
thirty.
BELINDA (absently). No. (Hurriedly.) I mean, how sweet of
you--only----
DELIA. What!
BELINDA (playing with her rings). Well, one of them, Mr. Baxter--
Harold--(she looks quickly up at DELIA and down again in pretty
affectation, but she is really laughing at herself all the time) he writes
statistical articles for the Reviews--percentages and all those things.
He's just the sort of man, if he knew that I was your mother, to work it
out that I was more than thirty. The other one, Mr.
Devenish--Claude--(she looks up and down as before) he's rather,
rather poetical. He thinks I came straight from heaven--last week.

DELIA (laughing and jumping up and crossing below deck-chair to R.
towards house). I think I'd better go straight back to Paris.
BELINDA (jumping up and catching her firmly by the left arm). You
will do nothing of the sort. (Pulling DELIA back to centre.) You will
take off that hat--(she lets go of the arm and begins to take out the pin)
which is a perfect duck, and I don't know why I didn't say so
before--(she puts the hat down on the table) and let me take a good
look at you (she does so), and kiss you (she does so, then crosses
DELIA below her and takes her towards the house), and then we'll go
to your room and unpack and have a lovely talk about clothes. And
then we'll have tea.
(BETTY comes