Allan Pease - Body Language | Page 9

that a
person guards as if it were his own property. Only those who are emotionally close to
that person are permitted to enter it. This in cludes lovers, parents, spouse, children,
close friends and relatives. There is a sub- zone that extends up to 15 centimetres (6
inches) from the body that can be entered only during physical contact. This is the close
intimate zone.
2. Personal Zone (between 46 centimetres and 1.22 metres or 18 to 48 inches)
This is the distance that we stand from ot hers at cocktail parties, office parties,
social functions and friendly gatherings.
3. Social Zone (between 1.22 and 3.6 metres or 4 to 12 feet)
We stand at this distance from strangers , the plumber or carpenter doing repairs
around our home, the postman, the local s hopkeeper, the new employee at work and
people whom we do not know very well.
4. Public Zone (over 3.6 metres or 12 feet)
Whenever we address a large group of people, this is the comfortable distance at
which we choose to stand.
Practical Applications of Zone Distances
Our intimate zone is normally entered by another person for one of two reasons.
First, the intruder is a clos e relative or friend, or he or she may be making sexual
advances. Second, the intruder is hostile and may be about to attack. While we will
tolerate strangers moving with in our personal and social zones, the intrusion of a
stranger into our intimate zone causes physiolo gical changes to take place within our
bodies. The heart pumps faster, adrenalin pours into the bloodstream and blood is
pumped to the brain and the muscles as physical preparations fo r a possible fight or
flight situation are made.
This means that putting your arm in a fr iendly way on or around someone you have
just met may result in that person’s feeling negative towards you, even though he or she
may smile and appear to enjoy it so as not to offend you. If you want people to feel
comfortable in your company, the golden ru le is ‘keep your distance’. The more
intimate our relationship is with other people, the closer we are permitted to move
within their zones. For example, a new employee may initially feel that the other staff
members are cold towards him, but they are only keeping him at the social zone
distance until they know him better. As he becomes better known to the other
employees, the territorial distance between him and them decreases until eventually he
is permitted to move within their personal zones and, in some cases, their intimate
zones.

The distance that two people who are kissing keep their hips apart can tell you
something about the relationship that exists between them. Lovers press their torsos
hard against each other and move within each other’s close intimate zones. This differs
from the kiss received from a stranger on New Year’s Eve or from your best friend’s
spouse, both of whom keep their pelvic area at least 15 centimetres away from yours.
One of the exceptions to the distance/ intimacy rule occurs where the spatial
distance is based on the person’s social standing. For example, the managing director of
a company may be the weekend fishing buddy of one of his subordinates and when they
go fishing each may move within the other’s personal or intimate zone. At the office,
however, the managing director keeps his fishing buddy at the social distance to
maintain the unwritten social strata rules.
Crowding at concerts, cinemas, in elevators, trains or buses results in unavoidable
intrusion into other people’s intimate zones, and reactions to this invasion are
interesting to observe. There is a list of unwritten rules that people in Western cultures
follow rigidly when faced with a crowded situation such as a packed lift or public
transport. These rules include:
1. You are not permitted to speak to anyone, including a person you know.
2. You must avoid eye contact with others at all times.
3. You are to maintain a ‘poker face’ - no emotion is permitted to be displayed.
4. If you have a book or newspaper, you must appear to be deeply engrossed in it.
5. The bigger the crowd, the less the body movement you are permitted to make.
6. In elevators, you are compelled to watch the floor numbers above your head.
We often hear words like ‘miserable’, ‘unhappy’ and ‘despondent’ used to describe
people who travel to work in the rush hour on public transport. These labels are used
because of the blank, expressionless look on the faces of the travellers, but they are mis-
judgments on the part of the observer. What the observer sees,